Post by Roy on Jun 3, 2006 19:13:41 GMT -5
JW Convention:http://www.jehovahswitnessonline.com/viewtopic.php?t=11773
Full board URL: www.jehovahswitnessonline.com/viewtopic.php?t=11773
Quit complaining about 2x2ism! They say the same things. Enjoy! ;D
So I just got back from the convention - yes, feel pity on me... I had to attend all three days, spend money on a crappy hotel, sleep in a crappy town, sit on my ass for 8 hours a day, and all just to hear about the same old crap you can read in any Watchtower.
I didn't take notes because not only would my head have exploded from the sheer boredom and stupidity, but I would be responsible for all your heads exploding as well. Are there any highlights? Lets see....
They issued a new 192 page book called Keep Jehawbwer's Day in Mind, or something like that. Didn't get a copy because the lines to get one were rediculously long and the thought of rubbing shoulders with hordes of mindless shells of persons didn't appeal to me.
One of the Bethel speakers went on and on about how they are placing hundreds of thousands of copies of the Bible Teach book PER MONTH. He said that for the month of April, they placed over 800,000 copies worldwide. I thought to myself, "crappers! who's placing them? and who are they placing them with?" Then a laughed inwardly when I thought of the 1% decline in numbers for the US. So if each babtism takes 8,000 hours to accomplish, it must take about 20,000 Bible Teach books to learn them! Absolutely hilarious.
The rest of the stuff was the same old drivel. The demonstrations were flabergastingly dumb, childish affairs with grown adults talking like they've had half their brains scooped out. You know what I mean.
Oh, and the drama. You know everyone makes sure to go use the restroom before the drama starts so they can see it? Everyone was in their seat, waiting to see the action. Alas, it only consisted of about ten people dressed in "middle east colors" with towels on their heads, standing around, waving their arms about wildly, miming the over-acted vocals we all know and hate. No action. Oh, except for this really lame part. There was this grey, square contraption that was supposed to resemble a stone altar with a golden calf on top of it. Well, there was this part where the prophet Jedikimiliziah whithered Jereboam's hand and the altar split in half. There was some kind of electric mechanism inside that triggered, and the thing moved so that it looked like it came apart. Except it had wheels on the bottom so it just looked obscenely lame. People actually laughed. I enjoyed looking around at the kids, because you know how excited they get at the drama. Well, they were yawning and fidgeting about 2 minutes into it.
As far as ALL the content, every single talk (and the drama) was just about how we should be preaching like there's no tomorrow, literally, and not doing anything else. About half a day was spent reiterating how we should submit to the elders and wives should submit to their husbands. The CO actually said "they've liberated women to the point that they don't know what to do anymore" whereupon my mouth was left gaping and I looked around in vain for similar expressions of aghast.
So that was it. I survived, although I feel beat to a pulp. I found ways to amuse myself, like singing obscene words when my wife was gone to the bathroom, seeing if anyone heard me. Also, walking endlessly around the corridors, reading the plaques about old athletic dead people, and watching the bafoon attendants get excited about anything they could get excited about. I almost wish I was still in "good standing" so I could have been doing something and not have to listen to the drivel in my seat.
Full board URL: www.jehovahswitnessonline.com/viewtopic.php?t=11773
Quit complaining about 2x2ism! They say the same things. Enjoy! ;D
So I just got back from the convention - yes, feel pity on me... I had to attend all three days, spend money on a crappy hotel, sleep in a crappy town, sit on my ass for 8 hours a day, and all just to hear about the same old crap you can read in any Watchtower.
I didn't take notes because not only would my head have exploded from the sheer boredom and stupidity, but I would be responsible for all your heads exploding as well. Are there any highlights? Lets see....
They issued a new 192 page book called Keep Jehawbwer's Day in Mind, or something like that. Didn't get a copy because the lines to get one were rediculously long and the thought of rubbing shoulders with hordes of mindless shells of persons didn't appeal to me.
One of the Bethel speakers went on and on about how they are placing hundreds of thousands of copies of the Bible Teach book PER MONTH. He said that for the month of April, they placed over 800,000 copies worldwide. I thought to myself, "crappers! who's placing them? and who are they placing them with?" Then a laughed inwardly when I thought of the 1% decline in numbers for the US. So if each babtism takes 8,000 hours to accomplish, it must take about 20,000 Bible Teach books to learn them! Absolutely hilarious.
The rest of the stuff was the same old drivel. The demonstrations were flabergastingly dumb, childish affairs with grown adults talking like they've had half their brains scooped out. You know what I mean.
Oh, and the drama. You know everyone makes sure to go use the restroom before the drama starts so they can see it? Everyone was in their seat, waiting to see the action. Alas, it only consisted of about ten people dressed in "middle east colors" with towels on their heads, standing around, waving their arms about wildly, miming the over-acted vocals we all know and hate. No action. Oh, except for this really lame part. There was this grey, square contraption that was supposed to resemble a stone altar with a golden calf on top of it. Well, there was this part where the prophet Jedikimiliziah whithered Jereboam's hand and the altar split in half. There was some kind of electric mechanism inside that triggered, and the thing moved so that it looked like it came apart. Except it had wheels on the bottom so it just looked obscenely lame. People actually laughed. I enjoyed looking around at the kids, because you know how excited they get at the drama. Well, they were yawning and fidgeting about 2 minutes into it.
As far as ALL the content, every single talk (and the drama) was just about how we should be preaching like there's no tomorrow, literally, and not doing anything else. About half a day was spent reiterating how we should submit to the elders and wives should submit to their husbands. The CO actually said "they've liberated women to the point that they don't know what to do anymore" whereupon my mouth was left gaping and I looked around in vain for similar expressions of aghast.
So that was it. I survived, although I feel beat to a pulp. I found ways to amuse myself, like singing obscene words when my wife was gone to the bathroom, seeing if anyone heard me. Also, walking endlessly around the corridors, reading the plaques about old athletic dead people, and watching the bafoon attendants get excited about anything they could get excited about. I almost wish I was still in "good standing" so I could have been doing something and not have to listen to the drivel in my seat.