Some guide line on CSA and behave in the friends homes

[nathan]

 
EMERGENCY MEASURES WITH POSSIBLE PERMANENT IMPLEMENTATION.

1) Workers must not except in unavoidable circumstances reside in the homes where there are unrelated children or other recognized vulnerable persons staying. Any occasion where it is necessary to stay in homes where such persons reside MUST be reported to and sanctioned by the overseer.

2) Workers who are alone must not stay in the homes where there are single people of the opposite sex.

3) Workers must not frequent or stay overnight in the homes of the Friends whilst the husband or wife of a friend may be absent. A degree of license can be exercised for short visits during the day time etc., where this can be justified.

4) Workers must not be left alone for lengthy periods of time with children. There must be a minimum of two workers present, or at least one other adult. A lengthy period may be defined from the circumstances and in which it can be perceived a risk exists.

5) Workers must as far as possible be provided with separate bedrooms. Where this is not possible and a room is shared, then they must be provided with separate beds. The practice of bed sharing must be allowed except in very extreme cases.

6) Workers must report to the overseer any suspicions of inappropriate behavior by any fellow worker, companion or friend. If any matter of a criminal nature is suspected then steps must be taken to ensure the matter is being reported by someone appropriate to the relevant authorities.

THE FOLLOWING SHOULD BE CONSIDERED FOR FUTURE IMPLEMENTATION

7) Workers should maintain a daily diary in which they record the homes and other places they stay along with any companions. Also, any problems of note encountered must be recorded in the diary.

8) In cases of suspected criminal matters of inappropriate behavior, a relevant entry stating who was contacted and when, must be entered in the diary.

9) Friends MUST be encouraged to report to the overseer any inappropriate behavior shown by a worker. They must also be encouraged if any matters of a criminal nature come to light, they must report the matter to the police or other competent authority.

10) All diaries MUST be handed over to the overseer at a convenient time in the workers’ calendar, e.g. convention time, or when a person leaves the work, or goes abroad, etc. It will be the responsibility of the overseer to issue diaries to the workers in his field.

11) The overseer MUST make provision for retaining these diaries (which can be electronic or conventional) for a period of not less than ten years. The diaries will be invaluable, at least for this period of time, as sources of reference and most particularly in assisting with any future investigations into improper conduct.

12) Overseers MUST make random contact to a number of the members of the laity in his field to ensure everything is okay from a friends’ perspective, during the mission term and/or once the previous year’s diaries have been submitted. Friends must be put at their ease and given the confidence to report any untoward matters.

The workers have brought the real world into the homes of the friends through the abusive behaviors of a few. They have devastated the trust placed/misplaced in them by the victims and their families as well as fellow workers. It is now time for the workers to join the real world and implement the foregoing or similar controls in order that the “worldly” tendencies within their ranks are strictly controlled.

In preparing the foregoing every attempt has been made as far as is reasonable to preserve the operation of the current worker environment against the primary considerations of protecting children and other vulnerable persons. As this includes workers themselves it is believed that many workers would welcome many of these suggestions even for their own personal comfort and protection. These suggestions are not meant to replace any education programs or reporting procedures, but are to be viewed as a foundation upon which these matters should be founded.

Author unknown

2) Someone wrote: This is addressed in the worker guidelines actually as far as acceptable behavior so. (It could fall under your idea of educating everyone about abuse issues)

sites.google.com/site/csacodeofc....priate-touching

Examples of INAPPROPRIATE contact/behavior, includes but is not limited to the following:

• Kisses on the mouth
• Inappropriate or lengthy hugs or embraces
• Holding minors, above the approximate age of 5, on one's lap
• Touching buttocks, genital areas, breasts, knees, thighs or legs
• Showing physical displays of affection in isolated areas of the premises such as
bedrooms, closets, bathrooms, or other private areas of a home

• Sharing a room or bed with a minor or youth.
• Going for a walk alone with a minor or youth.
• Spending time in a minor or youth s bedroom
• Informal wrestling with minors or youths except for legitimate sports coaching, in
which case another adult would be present.

• Tickling and piggyback rides
• Any type of non-professional massage given by an adult to a minor or youth.
• Any display of unwanted affection towards a minor or youth.
• Remarks that include compliments relating to sexual attractiveness or sexual development
• Lifting a child off the ground without parental consent.

Some feel that the appropriate age would actually be 2 for workers to be holding kids on their laps. There is also a list for APPROPRIATE touching/interaction with kids.

There is a lot of good information in those guidelines for both the workers and families. It would be nice for everyone to know what should be expected when workers are around families, as it protects the workers AND the kids. When people understand established boundaries, it makes interaction a lot easier. Parents would know that they shouldn't place workers into certain situations, and the workers would know that they have some rules which both they and the families they are around need to follow.

The following also needs to be added to this list (evidently):

1) no molesting kids
2) no molesting adults
3) whistle-blowers are to be encouraged with NO punishment attached to honestly bringing forth concerns.
4) do not shun whistle blowers
5) do not remove from the work any worker that is a whistle blower

[nathan]

1) PNG wrote : (Reuters) - The United Nations demanded that the Vatican "immediately remove" all clergy who are known or suspected child abusers and turn them over to civil authorities, in an unprecedented and scathing report on Wednesday. The U.N. Committee on the Rights of the Child said church officials had imposed a "code of silence" on clerics to prevent them reporting attacks/abuses to police, and moved abusers from parish to parish "in an attempt to cover up such crimes".[/i]

Link to complete article

The 2x2 ministry/Workers needs to heed the same advice: Immediately remove all workers who are known or suspected child abusers and turn them over to civil authorities.

~~ 2) NathanB: I AGREE 120% that the overseers/workers around the world to take heed of this or they will end up in prison/jail like the overseer Jerome F and Bill D. for not reporting CSA. Walker wrote: Bill Denk and Jerome Frandle had to complete community service/Jail due to covering up Darren Briggs' perverted behavior. Darren Briggs was arrested a few years ago for a wrestling session in a basement that led to molestation charges. A then 12 year old was victimized in a home where Bill was spending the night. Bill Denk and Darren Briggs were companions in 06-07.

Every worker, church elders should and must have a background checks for sexual abused history, Before they were allowed to enter the ministry And those who appoint to become church leaders.

3) Faune wrote: Scott ~ We had a similar worker in my home area of New England who left quite a lasting impression. Fortunately, he finally did get caught and convicted years later by the name of George Scandalis. How ironic that "scandal" is found within his own last name! Unfortunately, he got away with a lot of stuff, too, due to failure to report his actions by the F&W's until the day came when it finally hit the fan and he got thrown out of the work. However, he still remained an elder with meeting in his home years later, although he professed to being gay when young, but married a gal after leaving the work? Honestly, I don't understand the toleration within some churches for such perverse behavior? How some churches can put up a big display of disdain over the evils of worldly activities while they willfully tolerate a greater evil within their very midst and refuse to deal with it? [/p]

wingsfortruth.info/breaking-the-silence-2/convicted-csa-offenders/george-scandalis/


~~ Someone wrote: My uncle, Tom Y., a worker in Canada, was sent down to talk to me, before I was put out of the church. The desire of the head overseers in the eastern half of the USA, was that I be shut up, and left in the group. They hoped that Tom could accomplish this. In the process, my uncle told me and my mother (Tom’s sister), “that this had happened many times in Canada (workers molesting children), and that the girls get over it and ‘we’ can’t put the workers out, because we have so few workers, and need them so bad.”

~~ Nathan B: It's much better to have fewer dedicated workers than having 50 CSA workers in the work!The girls will NOT get over it. If he/she doesn't get professional help sometimes he/she will become abuser him/herself. It has to STOP now! or the abuses will continue to the next generation. The overseers NEED to educate their STAFF of workers about CSA. Too many workers don't understand how serious CSA is and they can go to jail for NOT reporting the incident to the police.

hubpages.com/hub/Childhood-Sexual-Abuse-Causes-Physical-Brain-Damage-A-New-Alarming-Study Childhood Sexual Abuse Causes Physical Brain Damage: An Alarming New Study Casts light on the terrible Darkness of the Incest Survivor.

garnetbird.hubpages.com/hub/Childhood-Sexual-Abuse-Causes-Physical-Brain-Damage-A-New-Alarming-Study

It is estimated that childhood sexual abuse affects over 40 million people yearly, just in the United States alone. To those of you, like myself, who struggle daily with symptoms and defense mechanisms acquired from childhood incest, this study will prove especially enlightening. It will also, hopefully soften the attitude of family members and close friends who must endure the drama of the survivor. So many times I have heard well-meaning people state, "Just move on and forget about it," or the more judgmental, "You're just CHOOSING to be unhappy."

Sexual abused within the 2x2 ministry and fellowship.

web.archive.org/web/20151207184236/http://2x2friendsworkers.proboards.com/thread/52/children-sexual-abuse-2x2-fellowship

[nathan]

Sex between Clergy/Worker and followers

1) Alexander wrote:

This is what the workers are failing to recognize, as in their dealings with TS when he asked over 18 overseers to investigate a sexually misbehaving worker- the overseers told him that if it was "consensual" sex between the worker and the professing lady, what could they do about it? Well, they could do like the military and have an anti-fraternization policy between an officer and an enlisted person and remove the worker from their place for abusing the trust of the congregation. A worker is much more powerful in position then even an officer in the military. The possibility of abuse of trust is immense, perhaps even more so then the psychiatrist/patient bond. This is what a leading advocate group had to say regarding a preacher in Georgia and his sexual issues that are the same as some of the current workers:

Statement by Barbara Dorris of St. Louis, Outreach Director of SNAP, the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests

We hope that anyone who may have seen, suspected or suffered misdeeds by Pastor Long will come forward, get help, call police, expose wrong doing, protect others and start recovering. If you have information that would either prove or disprove these allegations, it is your moral and civic duty to speak up now. Regardless of what happens with the pending lawsuit against Long, this case should remind us all that sexual predators are often powerful, charismatic and well-loved. It would be comforting if those who preyed on the vulnerable were obvious social misfits whose appearance would somehow set off alarm bells and give us the willies? or the creeps? They rarely do. Usually, predators are among the last people we would suspect of sexually violating others. At a party, the predator isn't some oddball sitting alone in a corner because others feel uncomfortable with him. Most often, the predator is the guy throwing the party.

We must overcome the dangerous myth that because someone is successful or warm or caring, he or she couldn't have done that! Finally, some will likely minimize Long?s alleged misconduct by noting that, in the eyes of the law, his accusers are technically adults. In our view, that's sorely misguided.

An educated, allegedly holy man who holds the revered title of minister or priest cannot ever have truly consensual and/or healthy sexual contact (whether once or repeatedly) with a congregant. It is always morally wrong and psychologically harmful, no matter how young or old the congregant is.

Ministers always hold an exalted position, and when they have any sexual involvement with parishioners, it is always wrong and hurtful. In any religious setting, there is an inherent power imbalance between clergy and church members. It is like a doctor-patient or therapist-client relationship, where any sexual contact is expressly forbidden. And for good reason: because it almost always results in devastation, with individuals and with congregations.

It's the duty of church officials to help congregants understand this. And it's the duty of lawmakers to both help prevent this egregious and hurtful misconduct and to help those who suffer from it expose predators, get healing and achieve justice. The clearest and easiest way to do this is to reform archaic, arbitrary an predator friendly laws that don't acknowledge this reality.

(SNAP, the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests, is the world oldest and largest support group for clergy abuse victims. We've been around for 22 years and have more than 9,000 members. Despite the word priest in our title, we have members who were molested by religious figures of all denominations, including nuns, rabbis, bishops, and Protestant ministers. Our website is SNAPnetwork.org)

~~ But be warned false accusers get SUED for millions of dollars and the possibility of spending time in jail.

1) False accusers get sued for 25 million.
Tonya Craft Sues Accusers In $25 Million Federal Lawsuit

www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/2520287/posts

2) Pastoral Sexual Abuse: It’s Not an Affair, It’s Abuse—Sandra Gates

www.thehopeofsurvivors.com/news_notes/not_an_affair.asp

web.archive.org/web/20151107165218/http://2x2friendsworkers.proboards.com/thread/118/clergy-worker-followers

[curlywurlysammagee]

Why would anyone trust a worker, ex or otherwise to come up with a set of guidelines for CSA.
It is like putting the lunatics in charge of the asylum.

[xna]

May 5, 2019 14:29:47 GMT -5 nathan said:

 
EMERGENCY MEASURES WITH POSSIBLE PERMANENT IMPLEMENTATION.

...

Why not just follow the instruction in the bible, instead of all these man made rues?


Matthew 18:19 King James Version (KJV)
19 Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.


1. Has this been tired?

2. Did it work?

3.  If not, why not?

[CherieKropp]

May 5, 2019 14:29:47 GMT -5 nathan said:

 
EMERGENCY MEASURES WITH POSSIBLE PERMANENT IMPLEMENTATION.

1) Workers must not except in unavoidable circumstances reside in the homes where there are unrelated children or other recognized vulnerable persons staying. Any occasion where it is necessary to stay in homes where such persons reside MUST be reported to and sanctioned by the overseer.

2) Workers who are alone must not stay in the homes where there are single people of the opposite sex.

3) Workers must not frequent or stay overnight in the homes of the Friends whilst the husband or wife of a friend may be absent. A degree of license can be exercised for short visits during the day time etc., where this can be justified.

4) Workers must not be left alone for lengthy periods of time with children. There must be a minimum of two workers present, or at least one other adult. A lengthy period may be defined from the circumstances and in which it can be perceived a risk exists.

5) Workers must as far as possible be provided with separate bedrooms. Where this is not possible and a room is shared, then they must be provided with separate beds. The practice of bed sharing must be allowed except in very extreme cases.

6) Workers must report to the overseer any suspicions of inappropriate behavior by any fellow worker, companion or friend. If any matter of a criminal nature is suspected then steps must be taken to ensure the matter is being reported by someone appropriate to the relevant authorities.

THE FOLLOWING SHOULD BE CONSIDERED FOR FUTURE IMPLEMENTATION

7) Workers should maintain a daily diary in which they record the homes and other places they stay along with any companions. Also, any problems of note encountered must be recorded in the diary.

8) In cases of suspected criminal matters of inappropriate behavior, a relevant entry stating who was contacted and when, must be entered in the diary.

9) Friends MUST be encouraged to report to the overseer any inappropriate behavior shown by a worker. They must also be encouraged if any matters of a criminal nature come to light, they must report the matter to the police or other competent authority.

10) All diaries MUST be handed over to the overseer at a convenient time in the workers’ calendar, e.g. convention time, or when a person leaves the work, or goes abroad, etc. It will be the responsibility of the overseer to issue diaries to the workers in his field.

11) The overseer MUST make provision for retaining these diaries (which can be electronic or conventional) for a period of not less than ten years. The diaries will be invaluable, at least for this period of time, as sources of reference and most particularly in assisting with any future investigations into improper conduct.

12) Overseers MUST make random contact to a number of the members of the laity in his field to ensure everything is okay from a friends’ perspective, during the mission term and/or once the previous year’s diaries have been submitted. Friends must be put at their ease and given the confidence to report any untoward matters.

The workers have brought the real world into the homes of the friends through the abusive behaviors of a few. They have devastated the trust placed/misplaced in them by the victims and their families as well as fellow workers. It is now time for the workers to join the real world and implement the foregoing or similar controls in order that the “worldly” tendencies within their ranks are strictly controlled.

In preparing the foregoing every attempt has been made as far as is reasonable to preserve the operation of the current worker environment against the primary considerations of protecting children and other vulnerable persons. As this includes workers themselves it is believed that many workers would welcome many of these suggestions even for their own personal comfort and protection. These suggestions are not meant to replace any education programs or reporting procedures, but are to be viewed as a foundation upon which these matters should be founded.

Author unknown

2) Someone wrote: This is addressed in the worker guidelines actually as far as acceptable behavior so. (It could fall under your idea of educating everyone about abuse issues)

sites.google.com/site/csacodeofc....priate-touching

Examples of INAPPROPRIATE contact/behavior, includes but is not limited to the following:

• Kisses on the mouth
• Inappropriate or lengthy hugs or embraces
• Holding minors, above the approximate age of 5, on one's lap
• Touching buttocks, genital areas, breasts, knees, thighs or legs
• Showing physical displays of affection in isolated areas of the premises such as
bedrooms, closets, bathrooms, or other private areas of a home

• Sharing a room or bed with a minor or youth.
• Going for a walk alone with a minor or youth.
• Spending time in a minor or youth s bedroom
• Informal wrestling with minors or youths except for legitimate sports coaching, in
which case another adult would be present.

• Tickling and piggyback rides
• Any type of non-professional massage given by an adult to a minor or youth.
• Any display of unwanted affection towards a minor or youth.
• Remarks that include compliments relating to sexual attractiveness or sexual development
• Lifting a child off the ground without parental consent.

Some feel that the appropriate age would actually be 2 for workers to be holding kids on their laps. There is also a list for APPROPRIATE touching/interaction with kids.

There is a lot of good information in those guidelines for both the workers and families. It would be nice for everyone to know what should be expected when workers are around families, as it protects the workers AND the kids. When people understand established boundaries, it makes interaction a lot easier. Parents would know that they shouldn't place workers into certain situations, and the workers would know that they have some rules which both they and the families they are around need to follow.

The following also needs to be added to this list (evidently):

1) no molesting kids
2) no molesting adults
3) whistle-blowers are to be encouraged with NO punishment attached to honestly bringing forth concerns.
4) do not shun whistle blowers
5) do not remove from the work any worker that is a whistle blower

The info in your No. 2 was taken from the WINGS website at:  sites.google.com/site/csacodeofconduct/home.

[nathan]

May 10, 2019 13:00:01 GMT -5 CherieKropp said:

May 5, 2019 14:29:47 GMT -5 nathan said:

 
EMERGENCY MEASURES WITH POSSIBLE PERMANENT IMPLEMENTATION.

1) Workers must not except in unavoidable circumstances reside in the homes where there are unrelated children or other recognized vulnerable persons staying. Any occasion where it is necessary to stay in homes where such persons reside MUST be reported to and sanctioned by the overseer.

2) Workers who are alone must not stay in the homes where there are single people of the opposite sex.

3) Workers must not frequent or stay overnight in the homes of the Friends whilst the husband or wife of a friend may be absent. A degree of license can be exercised for short visits during the day time etc., where this can be justified.

4) Workers must not be left alone for lengthy periods of time with children. There must be a minimum of two workers present, or at least one other adult. A lengthy period may be defined from the circumstances and in which it can be perceived a risk exists.

5) Workers must as far as possible be provided with separate bedrooms. Where this is not possible and a room is shared, then they must be provided with separate beds. The practice of bed sharing must be allowed except in very extreme cases.

6) Workers must report to the overseer any suspicions of inappropriate behavior by any fellow worker, companion or friend. If any matter of a criminal nature is suspected then steps must be taken to ensure the matter is being reported by someone appropriate to the relevant authorities.

THE FOLLOWING SHOULD BE CONSIDERED FOR FUTURE IMPLEMENTATION

7) Workers should maintain a daily diary in which they record the homes and other places they stay along with any companions. Also, any problems of note encountered must be recorded in the diary.

8) In cases of suspected criminal matters of inappropriate behavior, a relevant entry stating who was contacted and when, must be entered in the diary.

9) Friends MUST be encouraged to report to the overseer any inappropriate behavior shown by a worker. They must also be encouraged if any matters of a criminal nature come to light, they must report the matter to the police or other competent authority.

10) All diaries MUST be handed over to the overseer at a convenient time in the workers’ calendar, e.g. convention time, or when a person leaves the work, or goes abroad, etc. It will be the responsibility of the overseer to issue diaries to the workers in his field.

11) The overseer MUST make provision for retaining these diaries (which can be electronic or conventional) for a period of not less than ten years. The diaries will be invaluable, at least for this period of time, as sources of reference and most particularly in assisting with any future investigations into improper conduct.

12) Overseers MUST make random contact to a number of the members of the laity in his field to ensure everything is okay from a friends’ perspective, during the mission term and/or once the previous year’s diaries have been submitted. Friends must be put at their ease and given the confidence to report any untoward matters.

The workers have brought the real world into the homes of the friends through the abusive behaviors of a few. They have devastated the trust placed/misplaced in them by the victims and their families as well as fellow workers. It is now time for the workers to join the real world and implement the foregoing or similar controls in order that the “worldly” tendencies within their ranks are strictly controlled.

In preparing the foregoing every attempt has been made as far as is reasonable to preserve the operation of the current worker environment against the primary considerations of protecting children and other vulnerable persons. As this includes workers themselves it is believed that many workers would welcome many of these suggestions even for their own personal comfort and protection. These suggestions are not meant to replace any education programs or reporting procedures, but are to be viewed as a foundation upon which these matters should be founded.

Author unknown

2) Someone wrote: This is addressed in the worker guidelines actually as far as acceptable behavior so. (It could fall under your idea of educating everyone about abuse issues)

sites.google.com/site/csacodeofc....priate-touching

Examples of INAPPROPRIATE contact/behavior, includes but is not limited to the following:

• Kisses on the mouth
• Inappropriate or lengthy hugs or embraces
• Holding minors, above the approximate age of 5, on one's lap
• Touching buttocks, genital areas, breasts, knees, thighs or legs
• Showing physical displays of affection in isolated areas of the premises such as
bedrooms, closets, bathrooms, or other private areas of a home

• Sharing a room or bed with a minor or youth.
• Going for a walk alone with a minor or youth.
• Spending time in a minor or youth s bedroom
• Informal wrestling with minors or youths except for legitimate sports coaching, in
which case another adult would be present.

• Tickling and piggyback rides
• Any type of non-professional massage given by an adult to a minor or youth.
• Any display of unwanted affection towards a minor or youth.
• Remarks that include compliments relating to sexual attractiveness or sexual development
• Lifting a child off the ground without parental consent.

Some feel that the appropriate age would actually be 2 for workers to be holding kids on their laps. There is also a list for APPROPRIATE touching/interaction with kids.

There is a lot of good information in those guidelines for both the workers and families. It would be nice for everyone to know what should be expected when workers are around families, as it protects the workers AND the kids. When people understand established boundaries, it makes interaction a lot easier. Parents would know that they shouldn't place workers into certain situations, and the workers would know that they have some rules which both they and the families they are around need to follow.

The following also needs to be added to this list (evidently):

1) no molesting kids
2) no molesting adults
3) whistle-blowers are to be encouraged with NO punishment attached to honestly bringing forth concerns.
4) do not shun whistle blowers
5) do not remove from the work any worker that is a whistle blower

The info in your No. 2 was taken from the WINGS website at:  sites.google.com/site/csacodeofconduct/home.

*** Thanks, The part you mention was posted on TMB and I copied, I can't remember the link was posted or not.