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Post by leader on Jul 20, 2016 18:03:47 GMT -5
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Post by rational on Jul 21, 2016 15:23:34 GMT -5
I have talked to this person at length several times. Hie defense for his treatment of the children was always that doctors had told him how to deal with the reactive attachment disorder he claimed some of the children in his care had. Given it is such a rare disorder it seemed suspicious that there would be multiple cases within a single group of unrelated children. His story, on the phone, seemed clear and to the point. He seemed to be easily offended by the actions and words of others. It did sound like the foster children were a handful and it is probably a good thing to wait for an investigation before passing judgement. This really has little to do with the F&W and a lot to do with a severely dysfunctional family that happened to go to meetings. Unless you knew of the abuse how would you know (with 99% accuracy) that the workers knew of the abuse? Hoping for a full investigation before people pass juydgement. |
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Post by Deleted on Dec 28, 2016 13:02:33 GMT -5
Any child who is in foster care is already a damaged child. Furthermore, from the sounds of the news reports (which can never be 100% believed), the foster parents were also abusing the children. It says sexually, but that's probably the least of the abuse - most likely emotional and physical were the main weapons. It's rare to have only sexual - it's almost always with emotional abuse as well.
And yeah, anyone who knows how to actually parent children would have been able to spot something was wrong very quickly with these foster parents. The symptoms of even mild child abuse are very easy to spot - withdrawn, overly aggressive, overly quite, overly sad, bed wetting, concentration problems, etc. Children are not riddles, they are pretty much windows into the parents' behavior. That's why therapists don't need to hear much about a person's mal-adaptive behavior before they know what sort of probing questions to ask about the childhood. Therapist usually know more or less what deep secrets are in a person's background before the person is even able to verbalize it.
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Post by withlove on Jan 1, 2017 0:10:57 GMT -5
I have talked to this person at length several times. Hie defense for his treatment of the children was always that doctors had told him how to deal with the reactive attachment disorder he claimed some of the children in his care had. My response didn't show. Trying again... What exactly about his treatment of the children was he defending? How did this come up in conversation? |
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Post by rational on Jan 1, 2017 22:33:43 GMT -5
My response didn't show. Trying again... What exactly about his treatment of the children was he defending? How did this come up in conversation? The treatment that some of the people attending their meeting had issues with. It came up because it was the topic of some of our discussions. I do have some experience in that field and we discussed some alternative ways to deal with the issue. Different methods work with different individuals. |
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Post by Deleted on Jan 2, 2017 6:48:52 GMT -5
My response didn't show. Trying again... What exactly about his treatment of the children was he defending? How did this come up in conversation? None, it was just a case of opportunity and inclination. He already had the inclination to abuse and the ideal opportunity presented itself for him to abuse so he took advantage of it.That is nothing new. He probably has a secret history of it. |
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Post by withlove on Jan 2, 2017 18:17:46 GMT -5
My response didn't show. Trying again... What exactly about his treatment of the children was he defending? How did this come up in conversation? The treatment that some of the people attending their meeting had issues with. It came up because it was the topic of some of our discussions. I do have some experience in that field and we discussed some alternative ways to deal with the issue. Different methods work with different individuals. That's admirable of you to try to help. What did Daniel do to the kids in meeting? |
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Post by rational on Jan 4, 2017 10:55:25 GMT -5
My response didn't show. Trying again... What exactly about his treatment of the children was he defending? How did this come up in conversation? None, it was just a case of opportunity and inclination. He already had the inclination to abuse and the ideal opportunity presented itself for him to abuse so he took advantage of it.That is nothing new. He probably has a secret history of it. I am guessing this is complete speculation with no data to support your claim. |
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Post by rational on Jan 4, 2017 11:01:32 GMT -5
What did Daniel do to the kids in meeting? It was not what he did but what he did not want others who attended the meetings to do. Managing a child with reactive attachment disorder (RAD) is a difficult task and having others interring does not help the case. I know nothing of the events that led to the charges against Daniel and certainly do not condone any abuse. We were discussing treatment options as it related to attending meetings and other social settings. |
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Post by Deleted on Jan 4, 2017 14:28:03 GMT -5
None, it was just a case of opportunity and inclination. I he already had the inclination to abuse and the ideal opportunity presented itself for him to abuse so he took advantage of it. That is nothing new. He probably has a secret history of it. I am guessing this is complete speculation with no data to support your claim. Yes it is speculation in a way because I have no personal or special knowledge of the particular case, and on reflection I should have been clearer on my wording eg. Probably none, it might have been a case of opportunity and inclination. If he already had the inclination to abuse and the opportunity presented itself for him to do so he might take advantage of it. It is not very clear to me the kind of abuse involved: physical or sexual. Anyway any form of children abuse must be frown on and discouraged. |
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Post by rational on Jan 4, 2017 18:58:10 GMT -5
I am guessing this is complete speculation with no data to support your claim. Yes it is speculation in a way because I have no personal or special knowledge of the particular case, and on reflection I should have been clearer on my wording eg. Probably none, it might have been a case of opportunity and inclination. If he already had the inclination to abuse and the opportunity presented itself for him to do so he might take advantage of it. Abuse is often a way of exerting control. Not sure if people have an inclination to abuse.The charges were for abuse, physical, sexual, and emotional. I do not think there has been a trial so offering judgement without knowing all of the facts seems dangerous. |
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Post by Deleted on Jan 5, 2017 5:21:17 GMT -5
Yes it is speculation in a way because I have no personal or special knowledge of the particular case, and on reflection I should have been clearer on my wording eg. Probably none, it might have been a case of opportunity and inclination. If he already had the inclination to abuse and the opportunity presented itself for him to do so he might take advantage of it. Abuse is often a way of exerting control. Not sure if people have an inclination to abuse.The charges were for abuse, physical, sexual, and emotional. I do not think there has been a trial so offering judgement without knowing all of the facts seems dangerous. Fair comment, but check out recidivists and recidivism. |
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Post by withlove on Jan 5, 2017 10:53:17 GMT -5
What did Daniel do to the kids in meeting? It was not what he did but what he did not want others who attended the meetings to do. Managing a child with reactive attachment disorder (RAD) is a difficult task and having others interring does not help the case. I know nothing of the events that led to the charges against Daniel and certainly do not condone any abuse. We were discussing treatment options as it related to attending meetings and other social settings. Thank you for answering. Just so you know, I didn't think you knew about or condone any abuse at all. I asked mainly because, having been abused myself, and being concerned for others who might be in that situation, I wonder what onlookers pick up on...what is it that bothers them but stops short of what they would consider abuse? Children especially aren't aware of how public behavior of the abuser is still unhealthy, I would think. From what you say, he was bothered by the actions of others, though, not the other way around. Someone up-thread mentioned that the kids were like statues and people in meeting thought they were "odd." Anyway, no morbid curiosity here, just hoping to learn for mine and others' experiences. |
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Post by rational on Jan 7, 2017 1:29:18 GMT -5
It was not what he did but what he did not want others who attended the meetings to do. Managing a child with reactive attachment disorder (RAD) is a difficult task and having others interring does not help the case. I know nothing of the events that led to the charges against Daniel and certainly do not condone any abuse. We were discussing treatment options as it related to attending meetings and other social settings. Thank you for answering. Just so you know, I didn't think you knew about or condone any abuse at all. I asked mainly because, having been abused myself, and being concerned for others who might be in that situation, I wonder what onlookers pick up on...what is it that bothers them but stops short of what they would consider abuse? Children especially aren't aware of how public behavior of the abuser is still unhealthy, I would think. From what you say, he was bothered by the actions of others, though, not the other way around. Someone up-thread mentioned that the kids were like statues and people in meeting thought they were "odd." Anyway, no morbid curiosity here, just hoping to learn for mine and others' experiences. Abnormal social interaction is one of the things that is noted regarding individuals diagnosed with RAD. Children are very skilled at playing adults (especially those who do not understand the methodology of working with such children) and pitting them against one another. One of the more difficult tasks is to make sure the children do not manipulate other adults and create conflict. This was one of the areas that I discussed with Daniel. Examples from a text on the internet: Act superficial, charming, and phony, especially around strangers or people they feel they can manipulate in order to gain control (useful in “splitting” adults: “Why are you having so much trouble? She is darling!”).This was one of the interactions that demonstrates exactly what was happening in the meeting. Avoid eye contact with people, especially those who pose a threat for attachment (except for the purpose of lying or conning; then, superb eye contact is made).If the individual does not feel there is any gain to be made with attachment to another they will avoid contact. This might be the reason it was mentioned that the "...kids were like statues and people in meeting thought they were 'odd'." They were odd. |
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Post by CherieKropp on Jan 7, 2017 9:52:58 GMT -5
I have been told that he had a court date on December 21 which was very short.
They postponed it until some time in February.
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Post by withlove on Jan 7, 2017 23:50:48 GMT -5
I have been told that he had a court date on December 21 which was very short. They postponed it until some time in February. Looking at the court website, it appears that there is a hearing scheduled about every two months. Who knows how long it will take to get to trial. I wonder what has happened to the biological children--placed with family, maybe? |
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