Hey People!
Surprise! Very interesting topic!
Well, my friend here, John, from Texas, whom I've never met, obviously wanted to help me and I didn't even know he posted this.
A divorced single dad who used to go to meetings, read this, and called me and emailed me about it. He mentioned he read something on the internet that said I needed help, and he mentioned he knew of a job in his area and he had an idea to help my Jeep problems.
I was wondering how in the world this person knew about my situation?
So, I asked him. He told me. At first, I was like, ah, hmmm, not sure if I like this. But, the more I thought about this, I thought, well, this is a good example how the power of the global internet can be used to help others in a positive way.
How kind and considerate for my Texas non-professing friend, and the Calif. person to contact me. And, this guy who read the post and contacted me, who had his own family and car troubles, contacted me, I've never even met him, don't know him, and he doesn't even go to meetings.
This is being a Good Samaritan. This is reaching out to help others. It doesn't matter whether the person is a sinner or not. It doesn't matter whether the person has had problems in the past or not. It doesn't matter whether the person messed up and lost his money or not. It doesn't matter whether the person's been a "basket-case" all his life or not. It doesn't matter whether the person has had a life time, life long, ongoing history of problems or not. It doesn't matter whether the person goes to meetings or not. It doesn't matter whether the person is interested in going to meetings or not. It doesn't matter if the guy has had problems for 28 yrs. or 49 yrs. or 100 yrs. It doesn't matter whether the person has made 1 mistake or 1 trillion mistakes or not.
Here's what matters: If a person needs help, and someone wants to help them.
It's as simple as that. All the past history and background doesn't mean a thing.
That's bull-dust.
If someone needs help, what's wrong with helping them?
Jesus said, To forgive 70x7. That's over 490 times. In reality, I think it means, indefinitely. After all, who's going to keep an ongoing accounting of each incidence of sin or tresspass or mistake for 490 times. The idea is to forget the past mistakes, the sin, the background and just keep forgiving and helping or whatever.
This is Unconditional Love and Forgiveness.
But, it takes a divine nature, forgiveness, overlooking a person's faults and failures, love, care, compassion and a lot of patience to do such a thing. Most of us don't have those qualities naturally. And, if we really have the Spirit of God, then these are things that we hopefully grow in over time.
Yes, I've had a challenging life. Yes, I've had difficulty in many different ways over the years. Yes, I've had a bumpy dusty dirty road. Yes, I've had a few tire blow-outs, mechanical breakdowns, ran out of gas, blew up an engine, in my life.
To those who only constantly remind me and others that "he" has had problems for many years and this has been an "ongoing" situation - all I can say is I hope you never have to walk in my shoes or in the shoes of any one who has gone thru things worse than me - which there are plenty.
Because if you ever do, you're in for one hell of an adventure from your perfect little Disneyland world! lol.
It's definitely not been a boring ride. When you're in my situation, there ain't a day that goes by that you don't feel "alive" and know that the only way you're gonna make it is if God helps you thru the day.
It's been a real lesson in faith.
A journey into the unknown.
One thing that those who criticize me and judge me often fail to see, is that those who have been through hard times, gain a wealth of experience from the hardships they go thru.
They say, what doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.
I challenge any of you to try living out of your car for 6 yrs. before you make any judgement about me.
My mother, who died homeless years ago, lived a very hard life. One could come up with all kinds of reasons why this happened. It was a hard experience watching her go down this road. I tried everything I could to help her, but could not. This experience gave me a lot of insight into dealing with some hard things. I have a lot of love and compassion for the poor and homeless as a result of dealing with it in my family and in my own situation.
Eventhough I am homeless in my van, I am much better off than the homeless on the streets. While homeless, I continue to help the poor and homeless, regardless of their background or problem. Whether a drunk or drug addict or mentally ill. I think these are the most basic qualities of being a good human, not to mention, to be a good Christian.
My mom used to say, Don't judge an Indian, until you've walked a mile in his moccassins.
Ok, I am disappointed in some friends and workers, for not reaching out to me in my current situation.
For this reason, I am questionning my place in such a church and fellowship that can neglect people in need, or back off, withdraw help and friendship, cut off, shun, avoid, when some may just need a good friend, someone to talk to, someone to listen, someone to show love and care and understand. One doesn't always need words, advice or a lecture or sermon. Just stopping by to visit is worth more than gold to a lonely person.
I am not the only one who is thinking along these lines in the fellowship.
There is something wrong with a church and ministry that has lost its ability to reach out to others - or who limits how many times they will do this or who decides that 28 yrs. is enough, when Jesus said, 490 times is the amount of times to forgive or to keep on trying without limits.
So, I'm doing a lot of soul searching. I have other friends in the church right now, who find themselves being neglected by both friends, elders and workers. And, they aren't nearly as bad of a person as me, or as much of a failure as me, or anywhere close to a loser like me. They are just different. And, I'm just different. But, does that make one any less important?
There's a song in the last 10 yrs. or so on the radio that says something interesting:
"What if God was one of us, just a slob like one of us, just a stranger on the bus, on his way home?"
Ok, so right now, I am getting along just fine. Thank God, by His graciousness and mercy, that He once again helped me to get the rusty scary old van back on the road again!
I did not ask anyone to post this. But, they did out of the care and concern of their heart. So I am not mad at them for doing this. They did what they felt is good and right.
I could be embarrassed and ashamed and feel exposed and want to hide under a rock and disappear. But, no, I ain't gonna be that way. The hard things in my life that I've gone thru did not make me weaker and wimpier.
Instead, by the Grace of God, I have been made a million times stronger.
I learned when I was a young man, how to fix old broken down cars, because I grew up poor, i could only afford an old used car with many miles, and I didn't have the money to afford a mechanic all the time. So I forced myself to learn to fix cars. One time I totally took apart the entire engine and rebuilt the whole thing from the last bolt and nut to the pistons, rings, bearings, etc., and got it all back together and, it worked. The only think I got wrong was the fireing order, so a friend simply changed the wires, and it purred like a kitten. Thank God for the ability to fix things on the road!
So, today, since I can't afford to take the van to the shop, I try to fix it myself. I don't like to, but I have to. I had several mechanics try to fix it by doing some stuff, checking stuff, diagnostic test, trouble shooting, and none could identify the problem and fix it.
But, I took the info. I gained from them, and continued messing with it, and I went to a junk yard and spend from 9am to 6pm, all day, without taking a lunch break and not eating, and I found other vans like mine. I climbed inside, got out my tools, ripped things apart and got all greasy in the very hot sweaty junk yard. I took things apart. I studied them, how they work, what's inside. I took the whole throttle body (like carb.) off of an engine. Took the distributor totally out of the engine, took the electronic guts out of it and put it in mine. I took a chance. I cleaned up the inside and sanded some parts. Put it back together, and now it runs better than ever, and starts up every time within a second or two. So, it pays to be persistent in life. Keep trying. Don't give up.
Yes, I got frustrated. Yes, I cursed and swore and said a bunch of 4 letter words like a angry raging mad sailor. And, I felt bad about it later. But, I ain't going to worry about that every day and let that drag me down. It's those times that drive me closer to my Lord.
No, I ain't perfect. I've made plenty of mistakes. I've failed so many times, that I could probably write a book on the subject like this one.
I've learned more from my hard times and failures, than I ever have from the easy times.
Isn't Peter, a good example of someone who messed up and failed and got into trouble over and over again?
It's a good thing we have stories in the Bible of those who screwed up and had problems, because some of these self-righteous people today who got their neck ties so tight around their neck that they're just about choking and cutting off the blood to their brain, and some women with their hair pulled back so tight on their head that they got constant migraines and depression, ... they try to be so perfect and can't understand those who aren't, and they ain't happy with anyone's lives, not even their own - ... that we'd all go around depressed all the time if we had to be like them - and had nobody "real" around who we could relate to that was still actually "human" enough to admit it.
I like "real" people. I'm tired of "fake" people. And, I can't stand busybody people who spread rumors and gossip whether in person, online or by email - that causes people more trouble in their lives.
I heard recently about a professing person who went to the court hearings of a person who went to meetings who has been accused of some very bad things and has plenty of problems now, and this other person goes to the court and then writes everything down that bad about this accused person and then emails it all over to tell all the other friends. This has only made things even worse for this poor man who is already being punished. What kind of Christian is this, to go and gather all the dirt and then spread it all around? I've been hearing about this kind of stuff going on, way too much, too often. And, it doesn't come to hit home with ya, until it finally happens to yourself. That's when you really realize how mean, cruel and bad this is to do this to others. Those who do such things will justify it so many ways. They think they're doing good and right, but it's just plain mean, vindictive, a smear campaign. It can permanently destroy people and cause them to totally quit a church and have to start a new life outside the church. Is that what you want to do to people? Just hope it doesn't happen to you.
Can anyone relate to that?
The more you mess up and fall and fail, the more you realize and understand that you cannot earn or buy your salvation. That, instead, you are totally at the mercy and forgiveness of the LORD. That you must have the blood of Christ to save you.
Those who have sinned much, love much.
Ok, I'm still down in the hole, but don't think for a minute that I'm weak or a wimp or a loser. I've learned that I don't need anyone, but the Father, the Son and the Spirit. I feel totally confident that I can totally survive with nothing for a long time if I have to. And, I can survive without anyone's help if I have to. I am a survivor. Thanks to God.
But, life is a lot easier with a friend, than alone. I prefer company. I'm a people-person.
There have been several friends who have helped me. And, some workers who were kind to me. One sent me some money, which isn't something that workers normally do, some or most may not even believe in doing that, but it is actually scriptural, in that the apostles took up a collection to help the needy saints in old times. So, any worker reading this, it's ok to help a friend in need, if you have extra, and that means food or money. But, for some reason, in the church, that is not well understood. How to help others in ways besides just "spiritually", seems to be very misunderstood. In reality, to help on naturally, is doing something spiritually, if you are move to do it by the Spirit. If we are in the Spirit, then are natual actions can be considered a spiritual work.
And, friends, it's ok to help people, even if they are a "sinner" and loser like me or like others, if the Lord moves you to do so. You don't need to call up the workers or write to the overseer, if you have your own direct hotline to God, use it. Don't be like those who have to ask permission about everything. Being moved by the Spirit, is your permission.
Many friends seem to be very weak in this area. Many go around wondering what to do, and seem to feel they have to ask a worker before they do something.
Workers should be teaching friends and the church to be independent of the workers. Workers should empower the friends to be able to make their own spiritually guided decisions. Instead, some workers seem to almost want to control the actions of others, and want people to have to come to them for basic advice instead of teaching them to figure out things on their own. I'm not saying "all", but I've seen this problem over the years, and it hasn't gotten any better.
I've had people who were totally strangers on the street and here and there offer kindness to me, food, clothing, money, etc. People I didn't know. Some I'll never see again.
So, contrary to what some friends and workers may think, there are some very good people out there in the world who practise charitable giving, sometimes better than even the friends and workers. So that should be a big wake up call for those in the fellowship who don't practise being a good humanitarian or Samaritan.
It is a common belief that we just help people "spiritually." But, some F&W don't think you should help someone with food or job or money. But, there are cases in the Bible where it happened, so it's good to get familiar with that part of the Bible, too.
Regarding jobs. Other churches are more active in helping one another find work. Some churches are helping one another in my area, since so many members have lost their job. I see nothing wrong with that. I think it's wonderful, especially, if you're the one who is out of work and needs a job! lol.
I contacted one friend who is rich and has a company and many employees, and told him I was looking for work, and he never even returned the call, and I called twice. If you don't have a job for someone, at least return the call.
I've had a poor homeless black woman from the ghetto suggest we pray, took me by the hands, and made the most beautiful prayer for me and asked that the Lord would send His angels to camp around about me at night time while I sleep in my van, wherever I am and to keep me safe! Now, that was one of the most touching prayers and truly felt it in my heart. It was totally relative and applicable and practical to my current most urgent situation down to the street level simplicity. And, this woman has been homeless and now was living in a shelter and raising money to keep the shelter open, and she used to be a drug addict, maybe a prostitute, and in crime and trouble, and now she helps others, and even helped me with her prayer. God bless her. So, I, being broke, gave her a dollar toward helping her and their shelter. A dollar is a big part of my current net worth.
So, eventhough I'm broke, I still help others the best I can. We should all pick worth causes to contribute to. I like to give direct to the people in need, but not to big organizations where the money gets lost in administration costs, and very little gets to the ground level into the hands that really need it.
I find that those who have job, money, a place to live, family to help, and who have had a very strong and stable background, got a good education, and who took the safe road and worked for the government or a big corporation and never took a chance to start you're own business and then face business failure, and who didn't lose their money in the stock market, and somehow avoided this bad economy, whatever, ... those people will have a very hard time understanding and having compassion or sympathizing with those who didn't take the same road, but ended up broken down on the side of the road.
I find those who do help others, tend to be those who have experienced personal hardships themselves.
Family is important, but not all of us have a good, strong, close family for whatever reasons. Many people who have these things, have a hard time understanding those who don't. And, those who do have the family support often forget how much their family helped them along lovingly and financially over the years, so they tend to think they did it all by themselves, but they really didn't.
Nobody really makes it thru this world alone, all by themselves, without the help of another.
Life is about people and about helping one another.
Life is not about acquiring material things and money.
Your true net worth is what you have left inside of you, after you've lost everything outside of you.
Make sure your life isn't made up of just material junk.
I'm just venting some feelings. I know a lot of people around the world U.S. and the world. I still have some very good friends, I think. But, I got some people I've known for years, and have known me, who now think they're experts on my life and what's wrong with me. And, they are often quick to play pyscho-analyst with my life.
That's all fine.
But, just remember, I bet none of you could last 6 yrs. living in yr. car like me! lol.
It builds character!
It definitely tests your faith and what you're made of.
Don't for a minute think I'm weak and needy because of my experience. I'm one tough son of a gun.
When the going gets rough, the tough get going.
And, remember, no matter what hard times you go thru, "...this, too, shall pass."
And, no matter what you go thru, there's always someone who has it easier, and someone who has it harder than you.
We have Jesus to look up to, to remember how he endured hardship and the cross.
This gives all of us hope and encouragement.
If anyone is down and out, has lost their job, lost your home, lost your family, is broke and needs to know how to survive and live very cheap, feel free to contact me any time.
You can contact me thru John, the guy in Texas, whom I've never even met, but who took it upon himself to be my friend and reach out to me and even sent an unsolicited gift in the mail to my surprise. (Thanks, John.) And, he doesn't even go to meetings!
He and I used to have knock em' out, drag em' out, online fights on the old PMB about the "Us vs. Them" discussions, back in the late 1990s. I've never met the man, but I know I got a friend in him. I know he has a heart. I know he cares about people. And, I know he can forgive, because I probably said some means things about him online years ago, I'm sure.
I really don't care what anyone thinks anymore. I've had all kinds of people say bad about me, from friends to workers. I often find out later. So, I've come to accept that I'm not liked by everyone. That's all fine. But, when you're down and out, you certainly do learn who your "real" friends are.
Think about that, everyone.
If you hit the skids, and go broke and homeless like me, who will be your friends? If you mess up and make mistakes, who will forgive you and still be your friend?
Over the years, I've learned it's best not to have all your friends only with the F&Wers, but it's good to have other friends in other churches and even just plain good ol' people out in the world.
Why?
Well, because it's just good to have a variety of friends, especially people who are different than yourself, so you don't get stuck and trapped in a rut. But, most of all, if some people shun you, ignore you, neglect you, leave you alone, won't be your friend anymore, spread rumors, gossip, avoid, aren't hospitable, or think you're the enemy, it's good to have some other friends who still like and love you.
And, it helps us stay "real", by being with people different than ourselves.
And, it gives us the chance to share about the Lord with others, if we aren't just spending all our time with our closest friends, but if we reach out to strangers whenever we can.
To sum this all up, I'm very glad for some friends and workers who have been good friends to me. And, I assume they still are. And, I'm glad for some exes who have been kind. And, I'm glad for some total strangers, too.
God can and has used all kinds of people to share and minister to me over the years in various ways.
It's been a great experience in learning about people, learing about myself and seeing God bring me through some challenging situations.
Before I had money, I helped others. When I had money, I helped others. And, after losing my money and going broke and homeless, I still help others any way I can.
I have one professing friend nearby who is the best friend anyone could have. He's very sincere and genuine. He's been a real good friend. I think he's gone to bat for me when some friends and workers spoke ill of me. God bless him.
I have another professing friend who has experienced his own problems, but he's a very good friend, too. He's been misunderstood. People made fun of him because he has an old car. People didn't even reach out to him and invite him over. Now, that he's married, some have reached out. Of course, he wonders why they didn't do that before?
There are some friends around the world who came to my aid online, that I've never met, and I'm thankful for them.
You know who you are. I love you all. I won't forget you.
I'm not out of the woods yet. My hardship started before the bad world economy, so people didn't have much compassion and understanding. But, now that the whole world is struggling, maybe some understand better now?
I'm not really seeking any help financially. I get by on very little. I got a part time job. I'm trying to find a full time job. I live on very little. But, that's ok, because I grew up poor and I know how to live on little. I don't need a lot of money, a fancy car, a big expensive house with a huge mortgage that I can't afford. I don't need to impress anyone by having an "open home" that I can't really pay for. I don't need a nice car with a big loan to look good, but can't make the payments. I don't need a bunch of credit cards to live off of. I just live on cash. If I can't pay for it in cash, then I don't buy it.
If anyone out there is in bad shape and doesn't know what to do, or just plain feels lonely and needs a good friend, feel free to contact me. I understand. I care.
Some may think that my situation is one of weakness. No, it's not. I'm coming from a position of power and strength, because I have already hit the bottom, and I know how to live on very little. I know how to survive. Those who are just starting to lose and suffer financially, they are the ones who are in the hard times now. Because they are losing their fancy car, the house is being lost to foreclosure, and they are having to make emergency tactical evasive manuevers to down size. Maybe they will end up homeless? If so, contact me. I'll help you learn how to live on next to nothing and how to live on the road for free!
Seriously. I've met people who used to have good jobs, who are now homeless. I met a woman who made over $100,000 a year working in the HR Dept. at a big company. She lost her job, used up her savings, lost her apartment, and was living in her late model BMW. I met a family, mom, dad, and 3 little girls and 3 dogs, living in an older motorhome, looking for work.
I feel for those who may have hard times who also have a family, kids, since I only have myself.
Hang in there and reach out for help and let others know you need help. There's no shame in that. Those with a good heart will help. Those who don't, may criticize, but just ignore them, since they ain't your friends, anyway, so it don't matter what they think or say.
I plan to continue living on the road indefinitely. I've found a way to live cheap to be able to survive until things improve in the U.S. economy. I'm am looking into starting an online business that can be run on the road from anywhere, so I can live and work anywhere.
It's taken me several years of thinking about how to do this and what kinds of businesses would work like this. I want my freedom to live and work and travel.
It's too late in my life to go back to the rat-race and try to find some high paying job and work like a slave to buy an overpriced too expensive house and then be a slave to a mortgage all just to have a "house." Then, you're stuck and can't go anywhere. A slave to a job, a house, a mortgage, car payment and credit card debt.
I wonder how many friends and exes and others in this world find themselves in this situation?
This current bad economy is forcing those who were trying to "Keep up with the Joneses" and who tried to "appear" like they had the means to live "large" to have to get back to "reality" and simplify their lives to where they always really were to begin with - back on "ground-level."
I've even heard of some friends and some elders, who had to go back to work in their old age because they either lost a bunch of money or the interest rate on savings and money market accts. are down to less than 1% and they cannot live like they used to before. Some have had to give up their meeting and move away to other areas. They are stuck working while in their 70's. They ain't doing that because they want to. They have to. This is happening to many people in and out of the church, I can only imagine.
For those facing this, here is an idea. Sell your home and extra material possessions, and buy a good used motorhome and hit the road and see the country and you can work on the road in some other place. You can live in a National Park, and work at a concession store or be a campground host and get free rent. You can even live in a nice RV park, rent a space that would be way less than your mortgage, or property taxes or maintenance costs and operating costs of having a home. Why be stuck working like a slave at 70 yrs. old just to pay for a house? If you can, and you like to travel, get a motorhome. I've spoken to many retirees doing this. They live in different places across the U.S.
Many people are having to go back to living more modestly. The fact is, not everyone is going to be able to afford a nice home.
My plan is to move up from the van, and maybe later get a used motorhome.
Anyway, if anyone wants to know how to live real cheap, contact me. I'll show you how. I've been doing it for over 6 yrs. now.
It's actually not all that bad. The only bad times is when you're out of work, out of money, and you're vehicle breakdowns and you're stuck. Then, that's when the neighbors call the cops on you. Otherwise, you come in late and you leave early, and nobody even knows you were ever there. That's for those living on the road.
Otherwise, living in an RV park solves this problem, but then you have the cost of space rental. I have no rent, no space rental, no mortgage.
Frankly, I rather live in van, than rent a room in someone's house. I like having my own place.
My van is my "Mansion."
I call it "The Vansion!"
If you want to test your skills, strengthen your faith, see how mentally and emotionally tough you are, see if you can avoid getting a ticket from the cops, see if you can survive on little and on your own, and find out what it's like to have everyone think you're weird and nuts, try living in your car!
Doing it, helps you to stop worrying about what everyone else thinks. And, that takes away a lot of unneccessary stress that most people in the world have - trying to look good and trying to be accepted by others.
Foxes have holes, the birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no where to lay his head." Jesus.
The workers are homeless. Jesus was homeless. There's nothing to be ashamed about in being homeless.
But, if you have to be homeless, living in a van down by the beach is the best way to go!
Don't feel sorry for me, I like my life!
Have a great day.
God bless you all.
Your friend,
RoadWarrior
Ps. John, if you don't mind, if anyone asks to contact me from this post, please take their name and number, and email it to me and/or call me, and then I'll call them, just so I don't get any surprises and get caught off guard and wonder where it's coming from. Thanks ol' buddy. Keep in touch. All the best to you and yours.