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Post by TMS on Nov 20, 2006 2:09:00 GMT -5
With all the talk about clothing, hair outward appearance, I would like share a story about a lady I met this summer.
I had just moved to a new city, so I joined this womens bible study with a local christian church. I went the first day, all average usa women, in everyday clothes, ages 20-60, about 25 ladies. One lady was about 275 lbs, had acne, was blind, has ezcenma or some kind of rash, and her clothes did not match, and her hair was short, flat and not attractive. The study started...with a prayer, then readings, and then talk..and then etc...the blind lady said little, finally after she said something, I was shocked...her statements were the most itelligent, profound things that were spoken at that bible study during the two hours.
At the next Bible study, I must say, she had again the most profound, spiritually grounded input at the discussion....amazing. Some other woman mentioned oh, it must be hard for you to have such a wonderful outlook on life, yet are disabled. Her reply was, "Honey, i dont know the difference, I was born blind."
I feel that God has blessed her with an utter respect for peoples souls because she cannot see, she has no choice but to feel out your soul and spirit.
I dont ever want to be blind, but in this case, she was a wonderful learning experience for me. Perhaps this is an excellent example of how frivilous it is to judge people on their outside appearance and a waste of time...she taught me that in just one bible study.
Amazing!!!
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Post by Brick on Nov 20, 2006 8:24:39 GMT -5
That's a wonderful story. Thanks for sharing.
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todd
Senior Member
Posts: 270
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Post by todd on Nov 20, 2006 8:35:13 GMT -5
thank you - what a lesson for us to learn
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Post by withopeneyes (Mandy) on Nov 20, 2006 11:54:21 GMT -5
I have found that when you look into someone's soul, you'll find something worth your time and effect. I'm so thankful God looks passed all the doodoo and sees the diamond inside! Thanks for sharing, btw.
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Post by choosing words on Nov 20, 2006 14:06:19 GMT -5
OK, maybe I'm being too politically correct but "fat blind woman" isn't really a very nice way to describe a woman that you then went on to say very kind things about.
And really, does it really matter that she's a little heavy? You probably could have just left that part out and the story would have still been fine.
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Post by Vanity on Nov 20, 2006 14:31:43 GMT -5
TMS, Do you have issues with fat? I am trying to understand why you would title this thread "fat blind woman...." ........ And why is it an issue at all what she looked like. She could have just as easily been skinny woman with 20-20 vision ........perfect complexion and so on; or a blind woman, period, and if she had shared something equally profound, would you have noticed the difference? See how it is that we expect certain behaviours our of certain people just because of how they look? Or like, gee how could a fat person with acne say something so cool?
Let's turn the tables. Do we write others off simply because they are thin and beautiful; do we assume they are vain and shallow? I think in some cases and in some circles in society we do. It's a reversal of treating others based upon an assumption, based upon superficial stuff. It's like assuming most gorgeous men sleep with hundreds of women. Or it's assuming that a pretty woman has not brains. Simply not true. Do we assume all thin people have anorexia and that all fat people overeat and are lazy?
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Post by Gene on Nov 20, 2006 15:01:03 GMT -5
Did you last two people even read TMS's post in its entirety?
She wrote: "Perhaps this is an excellent example of how frivilous it is to judge people on their outside appearance and a waste of time...she taught me that in just one bible study."
Hint: If you were registered you could go back and edit or even delete your posts.
Gene
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Post by Encourage on Nov 20, 2006 15:24:13 GMT -5
Thank you TMS for the post. A lesson for all of us!
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Jackie
Senior Member
Posts: 790
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Post by Jackie on Nov 20, 2006 15:59:00 GMT -5
TMS, Do you have issues with fat? I am trying to understand why you would title this thread "fat blind woman...." ........ And why is it an issue at all what she looked like. She could have just as easily been skinny woman with 20-20 vision ........perfect complexion and so on; or a blind woman, period, and if she had shared something equally profound, would you have noticed the difference? See how it is that we expect certain behaviours our of certain people just because of how they look? Or like, gee how could a fat person with acne say something so cool? Let's turn the tables. Do we write others off simply because they are thin and beautiful; do we assume they are vain and shallow? I think in some cases and in some circles in society we do. It's a reversal of treating others based upon an assumption, based upon superficial stuff. It's like assuming most gorgeous men sleep with hundreds of women. Or it's assuming that a pretty woman has not brains. Simply not true. Do we assume all thin people have anorexia and that all fat people overeat and are lazy? TMS was saying that this woman changed something inside her. Maybe TMS had judged her at first, but at the end of her post she said she had learned something important. (not to judge on appearance) Why would that seem like a bad thing to you? People are judged all of the time on how they look, that's nothing shocking. But it's helpful to hear of experiences that change people from doing that.
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Post by TMS on Nov 20, 2006 16:02:06 GMT -5
Thanks for your feedback. The reason I said she was a fat blind woman is I wanted to make a point in my story. I tell it like it is. Actually she was extremely obese, I would guess her weight was over 250 lbs and she was about 5'5", the reason I spoke about her appearance is I wanted to make a point that she was extremely unattractive and was blind so my point is she had the most beautiful spirit and had amazing depth and perception about the Bible.
I was speaking from my heart and not trying to politically correct when telling this true story. I am as guilty as the other person by judging someone by how they look, esp if it is one extreme or the other. That was the moral of the story.
I don't have a thing against fat people, my best friend from high school is obese, and all my mom and sisters are overwieght. I am about 10 lbs overweight.
Thanks for appreciating my straightforward-ness.
I tell it like it is.
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Post by lilwolfmisty on Nov 20, 2006 17:32:57 GMT -5
Thanks so much for sharing that story TMS. I too have been thinking about appearances and how we judge. The bible does tell us that judgement if for GOD alone. I know that when I was in "the truth" that I was taught to judge people by whether they were in or out, by whether they dressed according to standard, by whether they wore makeup and/or jewlery. As and adult I have learned to look past that, don't get me wrong sometimes I still catch myself making assumptions based on how someone looks! I had to stop myself from yelling at a greeter at Wal Mart the other day she was almost pushing me into a scooter thing, because I look heavy ( I am around 285) however, I am capable of moving around quite nicely! So I got a lesson on how it feels to be judged! So now I must take that feeling and transfer it into how I interact with people being careful not to make assumptions based on appearance or other factors such as educational level, language, etc... I too am sooo glad that God sees beyond the garbage and into our very soul. My church I go to now has a saying NAMASTE` which means the Christ in me greets/beholds the Christ in you. How much better the world would be if we could see beyond everything else to the Christ that dwells in each one of us! Also remember the song: What If Jesus Comes Back Like That? by Collin Raye Came to town on an old frieght train He jumped off in the pouring rain Everybody said he's insane Just a low down no account hobo
What if Jesus comes back like that? On an old freight train in a hobo hat? Will we let him in or turn our back? What if Jesus comes back like that? Hey? What if Jesus comes back like that?
Born with a habit of drug abuse She couldn't help what her mama used It wasn't like she got to choose Now she's laying there all alone
Got a monkey on her back Nurses say they never saw a smile like that Doctor says she might stand a chance If somebody takes her home
What if Jesus comes back like that? Two months early hooked on crack? Will we let him in or turn our back? What if Jesus comes back like that? Oh what if Jesus comes back like that?
Nobody said life is fair We've all got a cross to bear When it gets a little hard to care Just think of Jesus hanging there
He came to town on a cold dark night A single star was his only light The baby born that silent night A manger for his bed
What if Jesus comes back like that? Where will he find our hearts are at? Will he let us in or turn his back? Hey?!? What if Jesus comes back like that? Yeah! What if Jesus comes back like that? Will he cry when he sees where our hearts are at? Will he let us in or turn his back? Hey!? What if Jesus comes back like that? Oh, what if Jesus comes back like that?
NAMASTE and AMEN!
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Post by Hobo on Nov 20, 2006 18:49:29 GMT -5
Thanks so much for sharing that story TMS. I too have been thinking about appearances and how we judge. The bible does tell us that judgement if for GOD alone. I know that when I was in "the truth" that I was taught to judge people by whether they were in or out, by whether they dressed according to standard, by whether they wore makeup and/or jewlery. As and adult I have learned to look past that, don't get me wrong sometimes I still catch myself making assumptions based on how someone looks! I had to stop myself from yelling at a greeter at Wal Mart the other day she was almost pushing me into a scooter thing, because I look heavy ( I am around 285) however, I am capable of moving around quite nicely! So I got a lesson on how it feels to be judged! So now I must take that feeling and transfer it into how I interact with people being careful not to make assumptions based on appearance or other factors such as educational level, language, etc... I too am sooo glad that God sees beyond the garbage and into our very soul. My church I go to now has a saying NAMASTE` which means the Christ in me greets/beholds the Christ in you. How much better the world would be if we could see beyond everything else to the Christ that dwells in each one of us! Also remember the song: What If Jesus Comes Back Like That? by Collin Raye Came to town on an old frieght train He jumped off in the pouring rain Everybody said he's insane Just a low down no account hobo What if Jesus comes back like that? On an old freight train in a hobo hat? Will we let him in or turn our back? What if Jesus comes back like that? Hey? What if Jesus comes back like that? Born with a habit of drug abuse She couldn't help what her mama used It wasn't like she got to choose Now she's laying there all alone Got a monkey on her back Nurses say they never saw a smile like that Doctor says she might stand a chance If somebody takes her home What if Jesus comes back like that? Two months early hooked on crack? Will we let him in or turn our back? What if Jesus comes back like that? Oh what if Jesus comes back like that? Nobody said life is fair We've all got a cross to bear When it gets a little hard to care Just think of Jesus hanging there He came to town on a cold dark night A single star was his only light The baby born that silent night A manger for his bed What if Jesus comes back like that? Where will he find our hearts are at? Will he let us in or turn his back? Hey?!? What if Jesus comes back like that? Yeah! What if Jesus comes back like that? Will he cry when he sees where our hearts are at? Will he let us in or turn his back? Hey!? What if Jesus comes back like that? Oh, what if Jesus comes back like that? NAMASTE and AMEN! Good song, sung by a great singer.......... I wonder............will there be any freight trains in Heaven?
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Post by choosing words on Nov 20, 2006 20:05:43 GMT -5
Did you last two people even read TMS's post in its entirety? She wrote: "Perhaps this is an excellent example of how frivilous it is to judge people on their outside appearance and a waste of time...she taught me that in just one bible study." Hint: If you were registered you could go back and edit or even delete your posts. Gene Did you even read my reply? The same point could have been made without the offensive title. We don't need the shock-jock title.
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jude
Senior Member
Christ Follower
Posts: 588
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Post by jude on Nov 20, 2006 20:47:28 GMT -5
Alright, alright alright!!!! This is ridiculous. Get over it. The gyst of the story is to think before you judge. We are ALL guilty of that particular sin at one time or another. Get off your soap box and enjoy her story for what it was. A good life lesson that we could all benefit from.
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jude
Senior Member
Christ Follower
Posts: 588
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Post by jude on Nov 20, 2006 20:48:23 GMT -5
Sorry for the amplification in my post. Sometimes it is hard to hold back.
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Post by between the lines on Nov 20, 2006 20:56:46 GMT -5
It's just rather ironic that the original poster seems to making a point that we shouldn't be judgmental about people's appearance and then the poster titles the post with something very judgmental and offensive. Do the mirrors not work in the poster's house?
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Post by jude unlogged on Nov 20, 2006 21:03:36 GMT -5
It's just rather ironic that the original poster seems to making a point that we shouldn't be judgmental about people's appearance and then the poster titles the post with something very judgmental and offensive. Do the mirrors not work in the poster's house?
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Lina
Junior Member
Posts: 68
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Post by Lina on Nov 20, 2006 21:42:36 GMT -5
I especially appreciated this story...
I have at times wished to be naturally blind. I never went so far as to pray for such a condition, it just seemed that it would be an easy answer to the judgmentalism that is so prevalent in our human nature. To be able to listen without prejudice, to depend on the spirit not hindered by visible distractions, to be heart-guided instead of mind-driven.
"More by faith, less by sight... teach me thy way."
Thanks for posting your heartfelt response to this experience.
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Post by TMS on Nov 21, 2006 0:24:30 GMT -5
Hey to all those posters who are saying my topic post is judgemental. Exactly. I am very judgemental, I will be the first to admit it...thats the point of the story. The woman shocked me with her amazing insight on the WORD, because looking at her she looked like she had not bathed recently or combed her hair and was pretty heavy...etc..etc...so I noticed that first. That was the point of the story.
I am not hiding my thoughts or feelings or trying to be Politicaly correct in this story, if I was PC, then the story would not have the same meaning.
I am guilty of judgement, like many others. I am working on this problem with the Lords help. This example shows me how its wrong to judge.
ps. By the way, I have frizzy hair and big stomach, if that makes me more human. LOL
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Jackie
Senior Member
Posts: 790
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Post by Jackie on Nov 21, 2006 0:36:24 GMT -5
Hey to all those posters who are saying my topic post is judgemental. Exactly. I am very judgemental, I will be the first to admit it...thats the point of the story. The woman shocked me with her amazing insight on the WORD, because looking at her she looked like she had not bathed recently or combed her hair and was pretty heavy...etc..etc...so I noticed that first. That was the point of the story. I am not hiding my thoughts or feelings or trying to be Politicaly correct in this story, if I was PC, then the story would not have the same meaning. I am guilty of judgement, like many others. I am working on this problem with the Lords help. This example shows me how its wrong to judge. ps. By the way, I have frizzy hair and big stomach, if that makes me more human. LOL hehe I was thinking the same thing. You stated that you had been judging her and then realized you were wrong in your thinking. I really appreciated hearing that because I'm very much the same way. (frizzy hair......buy a 'hair straightener' for 40$ (CND) and it'll make a huge difference......big stomach? do tummy crunches or get a rowing machine.....made a HUGE difference for me....or just be happy with how you look ) Ok, anyway....I live in an area which is largely populated by Native Indians. Many of them are hostile, drunks and really dislike caucasions. One night, I'm standing at a bus stop. It's cold, I was wearing a very cool-looking sweater, no coat, no gloves....it was snowing and blowing. An indian walks towards me. He was really ugly, he limped, he smelled bad and he just looked terrible....and his appearance scared me. He stood next to me at the bus stop and asked when the next bus was coming. I told him it would be another 30 minutes. He looked at me and said "that's too long for you to stand in the cold". He handed me a 20$ bill and told me to go call for a taxi. I was shocked and I wanted to cry with relief....because I really was cold and not happy about being outside at night by myself. I wish I had learned a lesson in "judging", but I didn't. I appreciated what he did for me, but I still find myself judging by appearances.
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Post by thanks on Nov 21, 2006 0:49:26 GMT -5
My lesson in judging.
At a fast food eatery, I saw a "floozy", fake red/orange hair, BIG red lips-covered in globby lip stick, TIGHT pants. The next meeting I was in, I spoke about this woman. How I wanted to look modest, be shamefaced, live a quiet, unassuming life serving God. After meeting I looked at myself. I had on a white top which had various colored ribbons running through it. Between the ribbons was space-my bra was easily seen.
I was so ashamed of myself. Here I was, standing up in meeting-pointing fingers and there were 3 point back at me. I am nothing to be proud of I thought of myself in the place of the Pharasee, I fast 3 times a week and I give alms. I need to be like the other man-Lord forgive me for I am a sinner.
I appreciated the story which started the thread. We can be so thankful to hear words of encouragment from believers!
Jesus came to save all who believe on Him, not just the pretty or richly dressed ones.
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Post by TMS on Nov 21, 2006 1:48:32 GMT -5
Thanks for the tips on frizzy hair, but honey I have to go to the blk salon to get my hair straight, and I am white, my hair is crazy frizzy....
Everyone has flaws, here are some of mine:
1. I am not always a good listener. 2. I interrupt people when they are talking. 3. I am too blunt. 4. Dont always think before talking 5. I am selfish in some ways. 6. one of my boobs is bigger than the other. 7. I have a big roll on my stomach. 8. I worry too much. 9. I think too much. 10. I am stubborn. 11. I am opinionated, which isnt always good. 12. I am not the best housekeeper. 13. I spend way too much money on clothes. 14. I dont give enough to charity... 15. I can be really mean.
Anyways those are just a few.....some of them are stupid, some are fixable, with plastic surgery..haha. Not something I plan to do.
Have a great day.
Love, stubborn flabby poster... (:
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Post by someguy on Nov 21, 2006 1:54:10 GMT -5
I would like to say thanks to TMS for posting this experience she had. I appreciate her honesty. Judging is so very easy for me to do as well as it is in my nature. Stories like your experience go to show the danger in judging a book by its cover and maybe even missing out on the beauty that hides beneath the surface.
Jackie you said you are in Alberta right? I am only curious about where you live because of your comments about the first nations in that area having a strong dislike to white folks. and thanks for your honesty as well.
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Post by PDK on Sept 4, 2007 2:22:47 GMT -5
Bump.
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Post by Jessi on Sept 4, 2007 5:32:17 GMT -5
With all the talk about clothing, hair outward appearance, I would like share a story about a lady I met this summer. I had just moved to a new city, so I joined this womens bible study with a local christian church. I went the first day, all average usa women, in everyday clothes, ages 20-60, about 25 ladies. One lady was about 275 lbs, had acne, was blind, has ezcenma or some kind of rash, and her clothes did not match, and her hair was short, flat and not attractive. The study started...with a prayer, then readings, and then talk..and then etc...the blind lady said little, finally after she said something, I was shocked...her statements were the most itelligent, profound things that were spoken at that bible study during the two hours. At the next Bible study, I must say, she had again the most profound, spiritually grounded input at the discussion....amazing. Some other woman mentioned oh, it must be hard for you to have such a wonderful outlook on life, yet are disabled. Her reply was, "Honey, i dont know the difference, I was born blind." I feel that God has blessed her with an utter respect for peoples souls because she cannot see, she has no choice but to feel out your soul and spirit. I dont ever want to be blind, but in this case, she was a wonderful learning experience for me. Perhaps this is an excellent example of how frivilous it is to judge people on their outside appearance and a waste of time...she taught me that in just one bible study. Amazing!!! I would be interested to know what the woman said that was profound, intelligent and spiritually grounded . . . What was it she said that impressed you . . . Christ's Forever, Jessi
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Post by Another judger on Sept 4, 2007 12:23:25 GMT -5
I loved your story too! I've found myself too many times thinking the same thing about someone & it has come back to bite me and it makes me totally ashamed of my thoughts. Yet many times I've heard someone else say the same thing aloud that I've been thinking but haven't voiced -- and I secretly find fault with them. I've overlooked people sometimes who irritate me, only to find later that they become some of my best friends. Yes, they may have things that annoy me, but I know I can sometimes even annoy myself! The lesson for me, is to not be so full of yourself. Jesus didn't just die on the cross for me, or for one who may look nice, be nice, but also for the ones we may consider unlovely! Look how many times a harlot, an adulterer or a poor person was used in scripture to even be relatives of Jesus.
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Post by Yes on Sept 4, 2007 12:51:06 GMT -5
Forebear one another.
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