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Post by apple on Nov 8, 2010 18:15:05 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? -did you get counselling? -did you feel lost? -did your family and friends avoid you? -did you cut your hair? -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? -did you try to get others to leave too? -did you feel relief? -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? -did you church hop for a few years? -did you join the Baptists? -did you write an exit letter for your family? -did you go to the cinema?
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Post by CherieKropp on Nov 8, 2010 18:34:47 GMT -5
It's not cheap to leave meetings:
Buying TV's, books, tapes, videos and video rentals, VCRs, making tons of phone calls while in the talking stage, the postage, the jewelry, the make-up, the slacks, the new wardrobe for the New Woman, piercing of ears, haircuts, hair coloring, hair perms, the Christmas decorations, gifts, and exterior lights, etc etc etc.
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Post by open mind on Nov 8, 2010 20:45:20 GMT -5
Who says you have to leave to do all of those things apple?!
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Post by rational on Nov 8, 2010 22:37:59 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? - Nope. -did you get counselling? - For what? -did you feel lost? - Nope - I was in the same city. -did your family and friends avoid you? - Nope. -did you cut your hair? - No more than usual. -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? - Nope - some clothes do not go out of style. -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? - For a while? Define while. Do you think people who smoke pot forget to wash more than those who do not? -did you try to get others to leave too? - Nope - hy would anyone try to impose their beliefs on others? -did you feel relief? - Relief from what? -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? - I did miss the social aspects. -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? - Nope. Although I have no idea where it is currently resting. -did you church hop for a few years? - Nope. -did you join the Baptists? - Nope. -did you write an exit letter for your family? - Nope. -did you go to the cinema? - No more than before.
Do you have any other preconceived ideas about what happens when people change religions or are you simply projecting?
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Post by apple on Nov 9, 2010 9:22:29 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? - Nope. -did you get counselling? - For what? -did you feel lost? - Nope - I was in the same city. -did your family and friends avoid you? - Nope. -did you cut your hair? - No more than usual. -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? - Nope - some clothes do not go out of style. -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? - For a while? Define while. Do you think people who smoke pot forget to wash more than those who do not? -did you try to get others to leave too? - Nope - hy would anyone try to impose their beliefs on others? -did you feel relief? - Relief from what? -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? - I did miss the social aspects. -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? - Nope. Although I have no idea where it is currently resting. -did you church hop for a few years? - Nope. -did you join the Baptists? - Nope. -did you write an exit letter for your family? - Nope. -did you go to the cinema? - No more than before. Do you have any other preconceived ideas about what happens when people change religions or are you simply projecting? There's no need to be so snarky.I want to know how others the exited.I know people did do some of these things.I had to get counselling for it. As for pot smokers every single pot smoker I know is a dirty creature from lack of washing.
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Post by Scott Ross on Nov 9, 2010 10:18:32 GMT -5
As for pot smokers every single pot smoker I know is a dirty creature from lack of washingHow many do you know? Just curious as the facts seem to point to us all knowing quite a few pot smokers. How Widespread is Marijuana Abuse? National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH)*** According to the National Survey on Drug Use and Health, in 2009, 16.7 million Americans aged 12 or older used marijuana at least once in the month prior to being surveyed, an increase over the rates reported in all years between 2002 and 2008. There was also a significant increase among youth aged 12-17, with current use up from 6.7 percent in 2008 to 7.3 percent in 2009, although this rate is lower than what was reported in 2002 (8.2 percent). Past-month use also increased among those 18-25, from 16.5 percent in 2008 to 18.1 percent in 2009.drugabuse.gov/infofacts/marijuana.htmlNow how many of those were people that had left meetings isn't in the survey, but I am sure that there are some of them.... I've known quite a few personally. Some were those who were dying of cancer and used it to stimulate their appetite. Scott
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Post by rational on Nov 9, 2010 13:53:31 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? - Nope. -did you get counselling? - For what? -did you feel lost? - Nope - I was in the same city. -did your family and friends avoid you? - Nope. -did you cut your hair? - No more than usual. -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? - Nope - some clothes do not go out of style. -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? - For a while? Define while. Do you think people who smoke pot forget to wash more than those who do not? -did you try to get others to leave too? - Nope - hy would anyone try to impose their beliefs on others? -did you feel relief? - Relief from what? -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? - I did miss the social aspects. -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? - Nope. Although I have no idea where it is currently resting. -did you church hop for a few years? - Nope. -did you join the Baptists? - Nope. -did you write an exit letter for your family? - Nope. -did you go to the cinema? - No more than before. Do you have any other preconceived ideas about what happens when people change religions or are you simply projecting? There's no need to be so snarky. I just wanted to know where these thoughts came from. I am thinking it is projection. Not sure what you mean here.You know people or this is what you did and think other people may have done so as well?I am glad to hear that you knew where to get help. How many pot smokers do you know? Do you think perhaps hydrophobia is a side effect of tetrahydrocannabinol? I have never noted that in the literature. I wonder if perhaps you are looking out at the world through distorted glasses.
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Post by apple on Nov 9, 2010 14:39:16 GMT -5
Scott I don't live in America but I do know quite a few pot smokers and a few others who take drugs which may or may not include pot.Pot tends to make one laid back- to the point of not socialising, getting up really late in the day and forgetting to wash.It is a good drug for serious pain relief.One person I know who smokes it openly admits that she washes about once a fortnight..
rational I'm not looking through the world through distorted glasses.I'm looking at the world clearly.The meetings is a cult; shows all the signs of one:
leaders who are not democractically picked and whom cannot be challenged and who say that they have a higher spiritually signifigance that everyone else,
exclusism "we are the ONLY TRUE way.Everyone else is hellbound",
a special language (for an example the term 'the truth' means Jesus but we have been conditioned to believe that 'the truth' means the meetings so when we see the term 'the truth' we connect it wrongly with the meetings),
money matters hidden from the people,
the expectation of blind obedience (when a worker has done wrong we are meant to pretend otherwise because a worker 'wouldn't be capable of doing wrong', we are discouraged from questioning a worker about anything, we must obey the workers' rules without question no matter how pointless they may be),
hiding various pieces of history from members and re-inventing it (for an example most members being ignorant of how the group really began)
So of course when people leave they may need counselling, they may feel relieved (and then guilty for feeling so), they may taste all the things of the world that had been denied to them, they may be shunned by those still in for leaving "the one, true way" so that the person in question might miss them and return to them (and the meetings)- and therefore "not go to hell".I know people who have been shunned & had rumours spread about them for leaving.I know people who went off the rails with their new freedom on leaving, I know people were angry & upset for having been lied to about the origins of the group for so long.I know those too who found it easier to write exit letters to leave and those who churched hopped on leaving.Then there are those who were completely put off the real Christianity by the fake 2x2 version and embraced atheism & paganism.I'm not saying my personal experiences, it's a personal matter.
I would like to know how others reacted on leaving, how they coped because it's interesting to me how we humans cope with such things, because I left and because it would be good for those longing to escape to learn the best way to leave from others who have already left.
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ria
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Post by ria on Nov 12, 2010 15:26:21 GMT -5
did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? ;)No, but I did get highlights and pierce my ears
-did you get counselling?not officially, but spent a lot of time talking with and connecting with some other ex'es.
-did you feel lost? Absolutely not - felt found
-did your family and friends avoid you? Not a B&R, no family inside; but area "friends" have avoided me; of course on seeing them at a store I am convinced they simply do not recognize me "out of uniform" ;D
-did you cut your hair? yep, first day out
-did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? the very next day
-did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? no, the need for a tranquilizer was totally gone
-did you try to get others to leave too? just a couple of "real" friends that were half-way out the door, and gave me information that helped me to get out
-did you feel relief? absolutely!!!!!
-did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? yes, yes, yes
-did you dump your hymn book in the attic? no, I dumped it into the trash. Then went to a christian bookstore, and bought some music cd's, and 2 different translations of the bible. My King James Versions went into the attic.
-did you church hop for a few years? Just a couple of months - reading different doctrines of various churches on the Internet helped to cut down the need to attend. Now I actually feel freed of the need to attend church every Sunday morning. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't. -did you join the Baptists? No, but I did go to the Baptist church a few times.
-did you write an exit letter for your family? A month after leaving (with no inquiries about my non attendance!!) I was so shocked by a letter on vot about abuse from Sheri Johnson, that I wrote an exit letter including her letter, stating how shocked and appalled I was, and that I could not remain associated with the CC church for that and many other reasons. Said that if they would like to know any of the other reasons, please contact me. No one did.
-did you go to the cinema? No, but I did start watching TV
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Post by Gene on Nov 12, 2010 21:13:24 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple No and pierce your nose? Not my nose -did you get counselling? No -did you feel lost? No -did your family and friends avoid you? Some did, some didn't -did you cut your hair? Yes! -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? Didn't have any meeting clothes -did you smoke pot for a while Never did anything for me (and forget to wash yourself)? That's just silly -did you try to get others to leave too? No -did you feel relief? Yes -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? Missed conventions. Didn't miss meetings -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? Of course not. It's in my piano bench right now. -did you church hop for a few years? No. -did you join the Baptists? No. -did you write an exit letter for your family? No. -did you go to the cinema? Some, but got bored with it.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Nov 12, 2010 23:33:56 GMT -5
-did you cut your hair? Yes! GASP!!!
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Post by pianoman2 on Nov 13, 2010 1:34:22 GMT -5
You can tell that Apple is a youngster. If he/she went to convention in the 50's or 60's, she would have been around unwashed people, and may have surmised that all of the convention goers were pot smokers.
Gene, old friend, thanks for the smile on the piercing Q&A. I won't ask, just keep smiling.........
I am letting my hair grow, mainly for financial reasons, and hope to have the Dave Crosby look down soon.
As for the rest, yeah it is pretty silly, but I guess it had to be asked.
Bless you young and naive Apple. Just don't start exotic dancing, please
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Post by apple on Nov 13, 2010 10:35:32 GMT -5
You can tell that Apple is a youngster. If he/she went to convention in the 50's or 60's, she would have been around unwashed people, and may have surmised that all of the convention goers were pot smokers. Gene, old friend, thanks for the smile on the piercing Q&A. I won't ask, just keep smiling......... I am letting my hair grow, mainly for financial reasons, and hope to have the Dave Crosby look down soon. As for the rest, yeah it is pretty silly, but I guess it had to be asked. Bless you young and naive Apple. Just don't start exotic dancing, please
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shushy
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Post by shushy on Nov 13, 2010 23:54:10 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? - Nope. -did you get counselling? - For what? -did you feel lost? - Nope - I was in the same city. -did your family and friends avoid you? - Nope. -did you cut your hair? - No more than usual. -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? - Nope - some clothes do not go out of style. -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? - For a while? Define while. Do you think people who smoke pot forget to wash more than those who do not? -did you try to get others to leave too? - Nope - hy would anyone try to impose their beliefs on others? -did you feel relief? - Relief from what? -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? - I did miss the social aspects. -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? - Nope. Although I have no idea where it is currently resting. -did you church hop for a few years? - Nope. -did you join the Baptists? - Nope. -did you write an exit letter for your family? - Nope. -did you go to the cinema? - No more than before. Do you have any other preconceived ideas about what happens when people change religions or are you simply projecting? There's no need to be so snarky.I want to know how others the exited.I know people did do some of these things.I had to get counselling for it. As for pot smokers every single pot smoker I know is a dirty creature from lack of washing. I found this highly amusing. Ratz snarky? Nooooooooooo never!
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Post by Tim Jones 'kyblue' on Dec 1, 2010 12:47:15 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? not quite -did you get counselling? still thinking about it -did you feel lost? nope -did your family and friends avoid you? yep -did you cut your hair? well, every couple months, but my wife did -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? yep -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? thought about it but I don't like attracting flies (har) -did you try to get others to leave too? am still trying. If an opportunity comes up, I'll be there pulling someone out of the quicksand -did you feel relief? yes, it's like taking a 9 1/4 year dump (it feels better the longer I've been away) -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? Certainly (and funerals too!) -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? oh yeah, but it'd feel better selling it on ebay to someone in the "wrong hands" just to piss some people off -did you church hop for a few years? yep -did you join the Baptists? nope -did you write an exit letter for your family? wrote plenty, sentnone -did you go to the cinema? yes
-did you drink or smoke now? I'll tip the bottle every now and again -did you find a church that you settled into? for awhile, but not now -did you find plenty of reasons to leave? with the workers and their beliefs
Good thread!
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Post by Karyzm on Dec 11, 2010 18:44:40 GMT -5
did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? Not purple and not my nose... -did you get counselling? no -did you feel lost?no -did your family and friends avoid you? yes I have lost contact with a lot of people I thought were friends. They have proven their friendship was conditional with meetings... -did you cut your hair? yes -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? most of them -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? I actually really enjoy pot. I also wash daily.. I am also very responsible. Pot does help one sleep easier especially if you are a teeth clencher/grinder. I like sleeping.. -did you try to get others to leave too? no but others did leave at the same time and it was nice to talk to someone who understood -did you feel relief? yes.. I had offered for the work and lost all peace that I had until I actually stopped going to meetings. -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? yes -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? no still have it -did you church hop for a few years? no, I have a hard time attending any church at all.. especially a christian one.. they all seem to be so judgemental, and limiting and conditional -did you join the Baptists? nope -did you write an exit letter for your family? no -did you go to the cinema? did that occasionally anyway
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Post by Gene on Dec 21, 2010 20:00:13 GMT -5
did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? Not purple and not my nose... Whose nose did you pierce? ;D
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Post by Annan on Dec 25, 2010 12:11:56 GMT -5
Bless you young and naive Apple. Just don't start exotic dancing, please What's wrong with exotic dancing? I'm a belly dancer, American Tribal Style. I never professed, but once I moved out of my parents house I never went to meeting again. Did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? Many, many years down the road I dyed my hair purple. I dyed it a neon blue too! Didn't do the nose thing. I was 28 years old before I had my ears pierced. I was too scared of having someone punch a hole in my ear, but my fiance at the time bought me diamond earrings. What was I to do? Did you get counseling? Yes, actually I did. It took quite a few years to overcome the control and physical and mental abuse I suffered. Did you feel lost? Not at first, but down the road I did. I found I had to shed all the guilt of leaving before I could rebuild any sort of belief system. I started going to mainstream churches for awhile but didn't find what I had hoped for there, what I hoped for I really don't know but I didn't find it. Did your family and friends avoid you? My family did. Didn't see them for two years. Of course it was all my fault. Did you cut your hair? Didn't have to. My parents didn't make us kids where our hair long. In fact they made us wear it short. We didn't have a choice. Did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? No. I left them at my parents house when I left. Did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? No. I was never a pot smoker nor took illegal drugs. No I did not forget to wash myself. There were times I didn't feel like it and went all day without washing and without changing out of my pajamas. Still do occasionally. Did you try to get others to leave too? Nope. Didn't have contact with any others in the faith. Did you feel relief? Oh you bet!! Did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? Oh yeah! Did you dump your hymn book in the attic? Never had one of my own. Did you church hop for a few years? No. I avoided all forms of religion for quite a long time. Did you join the Baptists? No, no, and no. I have a Baptist preacher uncle. Not going anywhere near those people! Did you write an exit letter for your family? No. I didn't profess in the first place. Did you go to the cinema? Rarely. Still don't. I'm not a cinema person. It's called cable TV and BOOKS!! I'm an avid reader.
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Claire
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Post by Claire on Dec 25, 2010 16:50:23 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? Neither, nor. -did you get counselling? No. -did you feel lost? No. -did your family and friends avoid you? No. -did you cut your hair? No. Not for about 8 years or so. It never grew very long so I had no reason to fuss with it. -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? No. I never wore long denim skirts or anything slavishly 2x2. -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? Neither, nor -did you try to get others to leave too? No -did you feel relief? No particular emotion. -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? No particular emotion. -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? It went into the piano stool and I think it's still there. -did you church hop for a few years? No. -did you join the Baptists? No. -did you write an exit letter for your family? No. -did you go to the cinema? Can't remember - probably not. I went even before I left - from time to time, if I cared to.
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lauri
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Post by lauri on Dec 28, 2010 18:00:48 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? Not purple but blonde. not nose but ears. -did you get counselling? no. -did you feel lost? a little... mainly concerned about disappointing family... -did your family and friends avoid you? no. -did you cut your hair? yes,very short. -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? no. -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? yes to pot(for about 10 yrs), but still remembered to shower... -did you try to get others to leave too? no -did you feel relief? yes and no. More relief after i discovered web sites that exposed the actual beginnings. -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? YES! -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? yes. -did you church hop for a few years? NO! -did you join the Baptists? no. -did you write an exit letter for your family? no. -did you go to the cinema? yes.
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eh?
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Post by eh? on Jan 2, 2011 20:50:42 GMT -5
No ... to all.
The only thing that changed was where I spent Sunday AM, Weds PM, etc.
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Post by juliette on Jan 3, 2011 22:34:37 GMT -5
As for pot smokers every single pot smoker I know is a dirty creature from lack of washingHow many do you know? Just curious as the facts seem to point to us all knowing quite a few pot smokers. How Widespread is Marijuana Abuse? National Survey on Drug Use and Health (NSDUH)*** According to the National Survey on Drug Use and Health, in 2009, 16.7 million Americans aged 12 or older used marijuana at least once in the month prior to being surveyed, an increase over the rates reported in all years between 2002 and 2008. There was also a significant increase among youth aged 12-17, with current use up from 6.7 percent in 2008 to 7.3 percent in 2009, although this rate is lower than what was reported in 2002 (8.2 percent). Past-month use also increased among those 18-25, from 16.5 percent in 2008 to 18.1 percent in 2009.drugabuse.gov/infofacts/marijuana.htmlNow how many of those were people that had left meetings isn't in the survey, but I am sure that there are some of them.... I've known quite a few personally. Some were those who were dying of cancer and used it to stimulate their appetite. Scott The person I know who smokes the most pot is one of the cleanest people I know. Come to think of it, I can't think of one pot smoker who has hygiene issues.
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Post by juliette on Jan 3, 2011 22:51:15 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? Hair is the same color, pierced my ears, belly button may be next. -did you get counselling? already had it -did you feel lost? sometimes -did your family and friends avoid you? didn't avoid me, but acted a little strained -did you cut your hair? yep -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? no, this was a gradual change that started way before our exit -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? no, that came later And I take 2-3 showers/baths a day -did you try to get others to leave too? no, I figured they had the same info I had, if they stayed they must like it -did you feel relief? YES -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? YES YES YES -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? no, it's around here somewhere -did you church hop for a few years? not really, attended a progressive christian church, but I'm pretty much over religion now -did you join the Baptists? out of the frying pan in into another one? I think not! -did you write an exit letter for your family? No, didn't really see the point -did you go to the cinema? this wasn't anything new. I think most "professing" people under 40 around here go to movies
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Post by Annan on Jan 5, 2011 20:26:25 GMT -5
And I take 2-3 showers/baths a day.
OCD?
The only time I take that many showers is in the summer time when it is stinking hot.
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Post by eyedeetentee on Jan 5, 2011 20:48:26 GMT -5
You may have seen movies or read accounts of people who have been abused and spend quite a bit of time in the shower trying to wash off the . . . whatever. Juliette is trying to wash off the cult effect. Plus, she's washing off the thought of joining the Baptists and preparing herself by cleansing extra good so her belly button won't get infected when it gets pierced. She's cleaning off the past, present, and preparing for the future.
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eh?
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Post by eh? on Jan 5, 2011 22:11:03 GMT -5
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Post by goodapollo on Jan 25, 2011 16:22:12 GMT -5
-did you dye your hair purple and pierce your nose? no -did you get counselling? no -did you feel lost? no -did your family and friends avoid you? no -did you cut your hair? not for about a year -did you send your meeting clothes to a charity shop? no -did you smoke pot for a while (and forget to wash yourself)? no -did you try to get others to leave too? no -did you feel relief? yes -did you enjoy not being at conventions and meetings? yes -did you dump your hymn book in the attic? no -did you church hop for a few years? no -did you join the Baptists? no -did you write an exit letter for your family? no -did you go to the cinema? enjoyed rational's comment here... our family were heathens... so yes, but not more than usual..
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Post by goodapollo on Jan 25, 2011 16:25:22 GMT -5
My exit was pretty quiet. I spoke to one worker who I admired for his fearless preaching of salvation by grace and his call for less of the rules. He was sad to see a fellow soldier leave and I was sad to see him venturing back onto the battlefield ...seemingly alone.
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