Aummy
New Member
Posts: 4
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Post by Aummy on May 20, 2010 6:07:40 GMT -5
Hello,
In Minnesota does one need to choose whether to continue professing or re-marry after a divorce? Can I do both?
Thanks.
Aummy
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julio
Junior Member
Posts: 142
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Post by julio on May 27, 2010 20:47:41 GMT -5
My understanding is that you are free to remarry and continue professing (taking part in meetings).
In the USA, it is only Alaska, Washington, Idaho, Montana, Wyoming, Oregon, Arizona, Nevada, California, Hawaii that have the rule that you cannot participate if you remarry.
Happy wedding, hopefully!
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eh?
Senior Member
Posts: 714
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Post by eh? on May 27, 2010 20:57:20 GMT -5
When did that change?
A few (maybe quite a few) years ago, the overseer was sent packing because the local elders did not agree with his liberal view of remarriage.
You could just ask the head worker ...
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julio
Junior Member
Posts: 142
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Post by julio on Jul 4, 2010 21:35:22 GMT -5
My impression is that this change has taken place over time. About ten years ago, I know of folks that were told they were needed for full fellowship in meetings.
In another case about fifteen years ago, a gradual change was made, first allowing choosing a hymn, then prayer, then full fellowship.
That's in two different states.
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Post by soldierbelly on Jul 17, 2010 1:35:09 GMT -5
Was the divorce while you were professing? Was/is the other person professing?
I'm curious why it matters from state to state.
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Post by someguy on Jul 19, 2010 23:37:01 GMT -5
Was the divorce while you were professing? Was/is the other person professing? I'm curious why it matters from state to state. curious eh that God actually has two sets of rules? Seriously I wonder how people can't see how ridiculous this is. Was marriage made for man or man made for marriage?
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Post by sharonw on Jul 20, 2010 7:05:30 GMT -5
Most D&R's in the eastern fellowship are considered case by case...what situations brought it about and whether either one were professing at the time of either!
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Post by Sylvestra on Jul 20, 2010 16:20:01 GMT -5
Man! Oh! Man! I'm so glad I'm out of there!
As a divorced and remarried person, I'll take my chances with GOD! Trying to live up to, or even figure out what the 2x2 believe or will demand is just too much trouble!
E
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Post by ronhall on Jul 20, 2010 17:10:55 GMT -5
Man! Oh! Man! I'm so glad I'm out of there! As a divorced and remarried person, I'll take my chances with GOD! Trying to live up to, or even figure out what the 2x2 believe or will demand is just too much trouble! E Seems like it's pretty cut 'n dried in California and the other left coast states. So not much to figure out there. The other areas are becoming more accepting of the practice. Combine that with the California economic situation and high tax situation looking ever and ever upward would seem to me to be an encouragement to strongly consider a move eastward. OTOH I've more than a few times wished I had a good excuse for not taking part in a meeting. Sometimes I don't figure this out until I'm half way through my testimony. A few Sundays ago two workers were getting noticeably fidgety as I strayed somewhat from the party line in expanding on the differences between building on the sand and rock using biblical characters as examples. Had I been divorced and remarried I could have remained silent, enjoyed all the rest of the meeting and no worker would have had to listen to me open my mouth to change feet! :>) So there's a bunch of options, I'd think. No need to think you are stuck -- unless there's something more to this I don't understand.
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Post by Sylvestra on Jul 20, 2010 18:37:53 GMT -5
Man! Oh! Man! I'm so glad I'm out of there! As a divorced and remarried person, I'll take my chances with GOD! Trying to live up to, or even figure out what the 2x2 believe or will demand is just too much trouble! E Seems like it's pretty cut 'n dried in California and the other left coast states. So not much to figure out there. The other areas are becoming more accepting of the practice. Combine that with the California economic situation and high tax situation looking ever and ever upward would seem to me to be an encouragement to strongly consider a move eastward. OTOH I've more than a few times wished I had a good excuse for not taking part in a meeting. Sometimes I don't figure this out until I'm half way through my testimony. A few Sundays ago two workers were getting noticeably fidgety as I strayed somewhat from the party line in expanding on the differences between building on the sand and rock using biblical characters as examples. Had I been divorced and remarried I could have remained silent, enjoyed all the rest of the meeting and no worker would have had to listen to me open my mouth to change feet! :>) So there's a bunch of options, I'd think. No need to think you are stuck -- unless there's something more to this I don't understand. RonHall, you are so sweet about it! I no longer have a problem about it because I don't go to meeting, nor will I ever again! (Well, I would "go along" if I'm visiting family.) That's one really wonderful thing about going to most other churches.....you get to speak voluntarily, or not at all. But, you still get fed. It's really nice. In His Love, Edy
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Post by emy on Jul 20, 2010 20:44:23 GMT -5
BTDT I'd be interested in hearing about what examples you were using - or why the workers were fidgety.
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Post by wildrose64 on Aug 23, 2010 23:07:49 GMT -5
What right do they have to say anthing about your re-marrying or not? They have never been married, never had to live with one person more than a year at a time, not trained as a marriage counselor and certainly cannot judge whether someone is worthy enough to be part of their group if they do remarry. The issue has nothing to do with salvation. It is between you and God, not some man made rules.
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Post by DumSpiroSpero on Sept 19, 2010 19:25:39 GMT -5
Jesus commanded against divorce then remarriage. Not sure of His stance on divorce only:
Mark 10 1 And he arose from thence, and cometh into the coasts of Judaea by the farther side of Jordan: and the people resort unto him again; and, as he was wont, he taught them again. 2 And the Pharisees came to him, and asked him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife? tempting him. 3 And he answered and said unto them, What did Moses command you? 4 And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away. 5 And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. 6 But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. 7 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; 8 And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. 9 What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. 10 And in the house his disciples asked him again of the same matter. 11 And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. 12 And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she committeth adultery.
It's pretty much black and white to me...
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Post by open mind on Sept 19, 2010 21:49:02 GMT -5
Good verses pa1ag1,
However you need to be careful of the difference between putting away and divorce. Putting away is the act of separation but not divorcing, i.e. still technically married, therefore that is why adultery is committed, however divorce is the act of dissolving the marriage...
Also the KJV mis-interprets the greek in some cases where it should say putting away instead of divorce...
I am not an expert on this and I think it should be left up to God to decide and judge on a case by case basis...
Just some of my thoughts
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Deleted
Deleted Member
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Post by Deleted on Sept 20, 2010 10:00:15 GMT -5
What about "putting away" your wife for the gospel's sake, i.e, leaving all (as some interpret it) to go-preach as an itinerant, homeless and poor preacher?
Was this another "exception" to marriage for life ? Would Moses not have said "give her a bill of divorcement?"
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Post by bfvernon on Oct 18, 2010 18:26:54 GMT -5
Divorce and remarriage have worked for me, even though I was ex-communicated. I found out for myself that God would not let me go, and that I still had the responsibility of living a Christian life. In fact, I believe that my second husband was sent to me by God. He too prayed for someone to love and to help him. He believes that I was sent to him in response to that prayer. I don't go to meetings any more (of course!!!) and I still don't think that divorce is a great idea, but sometimes there is no other alternative if things are really bad in the marriage. It's between you and God. No-one has the right to judge anyone about anything. We all need forgiveness and intercession. I accept that I need more intercession than people who have never had to make the decision to get divorced, but so what? It's nothing to do with anyone else. All I know is that GOD DID NOT LET ME GO. I have even greater faith and happiness now. If anyone would like to talk to me about this, because you are tearing yourself apart with guilt, I would be happy to help you. I haven't forgotten how lonely it all was, but I have come out the other side of it all now.
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Post by electbygrace on Oct 18, 2010 22:17:10 GMT -5
I still don't think that divorce is a great idea, but sometimes there is no other alternative if things are really bad in the marriage. It's between you and God. No-one has the right to judge anyone about anything. We all need forgiveness and intercession. Thanks for giving us the benefit of your experience. How true your statements ring: - "I still don't think that divorce is a great idea" - "but sometimes there is no other alternative if things are really bad in the marriage" - "We all need forgiveness and intercession." All I know is that GOD DID NOT LET ME GO. I have even greater faith and happiness now. That must have been precious for you to discover God's stedfast love for YOU! Here's another wonderful promise from God who is faithful to all his promises: "And I will restore to you the years that the locust hath eaten, the cankerworm, and the caterpillar, and the palmerworm, my great army which I sent among you" (Joel 2:25).
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Post by goodapollo on Jan 11, 2011 16:14:36 GMT -5
....I'll take my chances with GOD! Trying to live up to, or even figure out what the 2x2 believe or will demand is just too much trouble! E Amen to that!
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ann
Senior Member
Jesus did NOT say follow people .. He said follow ME!
Posts: 267
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Post by ann on Jan 18, 2011 17:00:33 GMT -5
AMEN! Total agreement here ... I'd rather answer to GOD any day at any time than any man/worker who knows NOTHING about marriage, family or raising children! Oh, the judgement they (workers) will face one day for ruining lives of those who follow blindly. ann
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Post by breakingfree on Jan 20, 2011 19:00:43 GMT -5
It seems to me that Jesus gave a justifiable reason to divorce and provision to remarry in the verses known as the "except for fornication clause." Matthew 19:19
And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except [it be] for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
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Post by apple on Jan 21, 2011 14:15:22 GMT -5
Good verses pa1ag1, However you need to be careful of the difference between putting away and divorce. Putting away is the act of separation but not divorcing, i.e. still technically married, therefore that is why adultery is committed, however divorce is the act of dissolving the marriage... If you divorce someone you are still "putting them away" (Mark 10:11).If you put away a wife to marry another well obviously that means divorce since one cannot be married to more than one person at a time. Mark 10:11 And he saith unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, committeth adultery against her. The only permitted reason to put away a wife or husband is if he or she commits fornication: Matthew 19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. Therefore if you put away a wife for any reason other than their fornication and remarry, you are commiting an adultery. Again, 1 Cor 7:10-11 says that a woman should not leave her marriage but if she does, she should either return to her husband or not remarry- and again the husband is told not to put away his wife. 1 Cor 7:10-11 10And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: 11But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife. 1 Cor 7:27 reminds married men to remain with their wife. 1 Cor 7:27 27 Art thou bound unto a wife? seek not to be loosed. According to 1 Cor 7:39, the only thing that releases us from marriage is death. 1 Cor 7:39 39 The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.
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Post by apple on Jan 21, 2011 14:44:05 GMT -5
What about "putting away" your wife for the gospel's sake, i.e, leaving all (as some interpret it) to go-preach as an itinerant, homeless and poor preacher? Was this another "exception" to marriage for life ? Would Moses not have said "give her a bill of divorcement?" Jesus changed the law on gets (jewish divorces) and said the only reason one could divorce was on grounds of fornication.Jesus did not say the only valid reason to divorce was if a spouse wanted to spread the gospel.There are many in the NT who travelled about with their families spreading the gospel: Simon-Peter was married and probably had family (contraceptives did not exist then).Philip the evangelist was obviously married too because he had 4 daughters. Mark 1:30 But Simon’s wife’s mother lay sick with a fever, and they told Him about her at once.
Matthew 8:14 Now when Jesus had come into Peter’s house, He saw his wife’s mother lying sick with a fever.Acts 21:8 On the next day we who were Paul’s companions departed and came to Caesarea, and entered the house of Philip the evangelist, who was one of the seven, and stayed with him.
Acts 21:8-9 8On the next day we who were Paul’s companions departed and came to Caesarea, and entered the house of Philip the evangelist, who was one of the seven, and stayed with him. 9 Now this man had four virgin daughters who prophesied. Anyway, I know married couples today who are involved in the missionfield together so it's not impossible.
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Post by Annan on Jan 21, 2011 18:48:52 GMT -5
1 Cor 7:39: The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.
What law is being referred to here?
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Post by faune on Jan 21, 2011 23:23:02 GMT -5
Granted, it is not God's order of things for a married couple to get divorced, but sometimes it is necessary to have "peace of mind" and not fear abuse of various kinds within a marriage. Most Christian couples I know who have divorced were the result of a last resort -- not a desire for change of partner or some trivial reason. In one instance, I Cor. 7 speaks of a husband "leaving" the marriage and the wife not being held accountable in such a situation. Although this may be referring to "abandonment," there is also evidence of a husband leaving the marriage in which communication has entirely broken down and there is no common bond holding things together -- even children suffer in such a situation and it leaves it mark for years to come! When the love has died and there is no substance left to the marriage other than a legal bond, I can understand a spouse departing entirely. Nobody wants to be in a "dead relationship" where there is no communication or affection between partners -- that would be like "hell on earth!" I find it hard to believe God would want us to remain in a situation that was detrimental to our health and our children. In such a case, "separation" is definitely recommended and usually divorce follows. I don't judge those who remarry, as I know how hard marriage can be for some and the divorce rates more than reflects this fact! Fornication may be one reason for divorce, however, a "dead marriage relationship" which cannot be re-established through counseling, may merit a divorce to free both parties from additional emotional pain? However, when children are also involved, an "equitable agreement" needs to be reached for the sake of the children. Often couples who do divorce find that they communicate better when separated and not obligated by marriage expectations. Although I have never divorced, I know how hard it can become to stay within a "troubled relationship" when you would like nothing better than to bail entirely from the situation. I agree, it's an individual choice between you and your spouse and your Maker. Workers have no right to interfere in such an intimate and personal situation no more than an outsider! We will all answer for our choices in life and God is just in His dealings with all of us. I feel we can count on this in eternity and agree with those who rather choose God's judgment over man's.
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Post by apple on Jan 22, 2011 11:15:16 GMT -5
faune I understand.I know a woman who left her physically abusive husband and later married a much gentler man, who had experienced true violence in the Vietnam war and did not wish to experience it again.My heart goes out to such people suffering like that.
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