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Post by Deleted on Oct 1, 2015 17:57:02 GMT -5
I have been to some wonderful funerals preached by the workers. But I have also been to those that resembled a gospel meeting with a casket. Hey, I know it is tempting to do so, since it is hard to get that many "outsiders" in one room these days. The grieving family members deserve better! How about some comfort? How about the good attributes of the deceased apart from his/her love for the workers, friends, meetings, etc.?
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Post by Deleted on Oct 1, 2015 18:02:04 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Oct 1, 2015 18:02:59 GMT -5
Sheep and goats
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Post by Deleted on Oct 1, 2015 18:06:05 GMT -5
I have been to some wonderful funerals preached by the workers. But I have also been to those that resembled a gospel meeting with a casket. Hey, I know it is tempting to do so, since it is hard to get that many "outsiders" in one room these days. The grieving family members deserve better! How about some comfort? How about the good attributes of the deceased apart from his/her love for the workers, friends, meetings, etc.? you can comfort the grievers and have a gospel meeting all at the same time...I want my funeral to be a gospel meeting!
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Post by Deleted on Oct 1, 2015 18:12:32 GMT -5
My cousin professed just before she died. The brother worker actually told us not to use this as an example! I felt sorry for my aunt (80s) who lost her 50 something aged daughter. Sometimes a few have said some mean things that were out of place. A worker spent some time on why this way doesn't have a name and how the workers don't have a home at my dad's funeral which was pretty weird, if you ask me.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 1, 2015 18:16:19 GMT -5
Bert, read sentence # 1 in the OP.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 1, 2015 18:20:32 GMT -5
It's true and we can do nothing about it...
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Post by Deleted on Oct 1, 2015 18:27:21 GMT -5
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Post by joanna on Oct 1, 2015 20:24:59 GMT -5
When preachers aim to convert vulnerable, grieving people it is a desperate ploy to manipulate a captive audience. I have witnessed this a number of times, including at a close relative's funeral.
I directly requested the preachers taking a professing relative's funeral to avoid preaching (the deceased professing person had openly expressed their aversion to this practice) and this was respected. However as the next funeral included one of the preachers whom I had previously spoken to, I did not feel there was a need to ask again. Wrong. The funeral included blatant attempts to convert the 'wayward family and others' present. One preacher even made a direct rebuttal to something mentioned by a young person when speaking about the deceased person during the service. Some non-professing people attending the funeral later made negative comments about the preachers performance. This disregard for others is consistent with unethical practice.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 1, 2015 21:22:01 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Oct 1, 2015 22:45:28 GMT -5
I have been to some wonderful funerals preached by the workers. But I have also been to those that resembled a gospel meeting with a casket. Hey, I know it is tempting to do so, since it is hard to get that many "outsiders" in one room these days. The grieving family members deserve better! How about some comfort? How about the good attributes of the deceased apart from his/her love for the workers, friends, meetings, etc.? yes it is sad that Christians would want to hear about Jesus
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Post by Roselyn T on Oct 1, 2015 23:10:52 GMT -5
A funeral should be a celebration of life, not a gospel meeting ! joanna has summed it up !
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Post by Deleted on Oct 2, 2015 3:15:43 GMT -5
A funeral should be a celebration of life, not a gospel meeting ! joanna has summed it up ! celebration of the Christ life
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Post by dmmichgood on Oct 2, 2015 3:21:07 GMT -5
Bert, your cartoons aren't even exaggerated to the point of being humorous. I said before, don't give up your day job. You aren't aGary Larson or Charles M. Schulz.
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Post by CherieKropp on Oct 2, 2015 8:18:43 GMT -5
At my (professing) fathers funeral nearly 2 yrs ago, we asked workers to have a part in the service (they did not officiate) and not to hold a gospel meeting or to attempt to peddle their method and way. Before the service, he reviewed with us the message he was planning to give--this was his suggestion. His theme was a life well spent and his message was very fitting and comforting.
The family officiated the service, my bro played the piano, granddaughter sang, and my husband, bro, cousin and I provided interesting details about my dad's life history including the 32 years he spent on the Christian Convention grounds in Mississippi; and the floor was opened to any who wanted to speak. About 7-8 did so, including at least 2 workers, one of whom mentioned by name "The Christian Convention" on my folks property.
A year or so later the same worker held my mother in law's funeral and spoke mostly about how much she loved the way, workers, meetings and friends.
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Post by rational on Oct 2, 2015 10:55:22 GMT -5
A funeral should be a celebration of life, not a gospel meeting ! joanna has summed it up ! celebration of the Christ life It could be the case that the majority of the people attending would rather hear about someone they actually had known. I have been to funerals, F&W, RCC, Jewish, etc. where it would have been difficult to know there was anyone deceased. At least the Jews (some) observe Shiva which provides the family with much more support than the traditional christian wake. People should express their desires regarding their own funeral. I, for example, am thinking I would perhaps like to be fixed with animatronics to provide a small parting surprise to people who might show up. I firmly believe the fun needs to be put back in funerals.
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Post by xna on Oct 2, 2015 11:06:49 GMT -5
I've seen some preying at the funeral home
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Post by learning on Oct 2, 2015 12:52:33 GMT -5
Funny that this forum topic comes up now because I too have been thinking about this. I've been to a couple funerals recently where the theme was definitely more about the way/ministry/etc than about the deceased person and I thought it was opportunistic and inappropriate that they delivered that message in that venue. Until I realized that the person in the casket probably would have nodded his/her head in agreement to all of what was being said. So, being a memorial service for that person I concluded that it represented the person pretty well and my original reaction was irrelevant.
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Post by fixit on Oct 2, 2015 14:19:07 GMT -5
Funny that this forum topic comes up now because I too have been thinking about this. I've been to a couple funerals recently where the theme was definitely more about the way/ministry/etc than about the deceased person and I thought it was opportunistic and inappropriate that they delivered that message in that venue. Until I realized that the person in the casket probably would have nodded his/her head in agreement to all of what was being said. So, being a memorial service for that person I concluded that it represented the person pretty well and my original reaction was irrelevant. A good post, learning. From my observations, workers in recent years have balanced the wishes of the family and the deceased pretty well. It's a difficult time for everyone concerned - including workers.
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Post by Deleted on Oct 2, 2015 16:26:36 GMT -5
celebration of the Christ life It could be the case that the majority of the people attending would rather hear about someone they actually had known. I have been to funerals, F&W, RCC, Jewish, etc. where it would have been difficult to know there was anyone deceased. At least the Jews (some) observe Shiva which provides the family with much more support than the traditional christian wake. People should express their desires regarding their own funeral. I, for example, am thinking I would perhaps like to be fixed with animatronics to provide a small parting surprise to people who might show up. I firmly believe the fun needs to be put back in funerals. and i have been to our funerals which have been conducted solely by the family with a little from the workers people in this fellowship have the right to have or neither have the workers speak or take any part in the funeral i would hazard a guess that most would want the workers to speak at their funerals about their live with Christ
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Post by BobWilliston on Oct 2, 2015 16:32:50 GMT -5
I have been to some wonderful funerals preached by the workers. But I have also been to those that resembled a gospel meeting with a casket. Hey, I know it is tempting to do so, since it is hard to get that many "outsiders" in one room these days. The grieving family members deserve better! How about some comfort? How about the good attributes of the deceased apart from his/her love for the workers, friends, meetings, etc.? you can comfort the grievers and have a gospel meeting all at the same time...I want my funeral to be a gospel meeting! You'd better make sure your corpse doesn't sit up and tell the congregation you were just turned away at the pearly gates. Someone might laugh.
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Post by BobWilliston on Oct 2, 2015 16:35:50 GMT -5
A funeral should be a celebration of life, not a gospel meeting ! joanna has summed it up ! celebration of the Christ life Whose funeral is it?
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Post by Alan Vandermyden on Oct 2, 2015 16:50:40 GMT -5
On a different, but related, note, I wonder if any of you realize how workers "groan" at being considered "free" preachers, available to preach a funeral service for anyone's relation who did not have a particular religious affiliation. I was one of those workers, and I heard numerous companions and peers express similar sentiments.
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Post by BobWilliston on Oct 2, 2015 16:57:48 GMT -5
It could be the case that the majority of the people attending would rather hear about someone they actually had known. I have been to funerals, F&W, RCC, Jewish, etc. where it would have been difficult to know there was anyone deceased. At least the Jews (some) observe Shiva which provides the family with much more support than the traditional christian wake. People should express their desires regarding their own funeral. I, for example, am thinking I would perhaps like to be fixed with animatronics to provide a small parting surprise to people who might show up. I firmly believe the fun needs to be put back in funerals. and i have been to our funerals which have been conducted solely by the family with a little from the workers people in this fellowship have the right to have or neither have the workers speak or take any part in the funeral i would hazard a guess that most would want the workers to speak at their funerals about their live with Christ My guess is that most of the friends feel they are EXPECTED to have the workers conduct their funerals. I even heard of one worker who was upset that another worker was asked to conduct the funeral -- when he thought he was supposed to be the one doing it. The only safe way to deal with one's funeral is to plan it yourself when you're well and make sure trusted next of kin know what you want. Buy a casket and leave a notarized list of instructions for the funeral director.
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Post by BobWilliston on Oct 2, 2015 17:02:20 GMT -5
On a different, but related, note, I wonder if any of you realize how workers "groan" at being considered "free" preachers, available to preach a funeral service for anyone's relation who did not have a particular religious affiliation. I was one of the workers, and I heard numerous companions and peers express similar sentiments. And undoubtedly such workers wonder if the deceased really wanted a worker to conduct his funeral. Funerals often get turned into political statements.
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Post by dmmichgood on Oct 3, 2015 0:44:43 GMT -5
and i have been to our funerals which have been conducted solely by the family with a little from the workers people in this fellowship have the right to have or neither have the workers speak or take any part in the funeral i would hazard a guess that most would want the workers to speak at their funerals about their live with Christ My guess is that most of the friends feel they are EXPECTED to have the workers conduct their funerals. I even heard of one worker who was upset that another worker was asked to conduct the funeral -- when he thought he was supposed to be the one doing it. The only safe way to deal with one's funeral is to plan it yourself when you're well and make sure trusted next of kin know what you want. Buy a casket and leave a notarized list of instructions for the funeral director. Right. My children would know automatically that I would not want anyone "preaching" my funeral; worker or otherwise.
I have a personal statement I'd like read, and the"Desiderata," the prose poem by Max Ehrmann. I have a couple of songs with the recordings by the authors.
They are all bundled together and in the safe where my children knowing that they are there. No casket, -cremation and that is it.
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Post by withlove on Oct 3, 2015 0:50:45 GMT -5
Whatever happened to "we don't bury or marry?" Anyone know?
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Post by rational on Oct 3, 2015 0:54:11 GMT -5
Whatever happened to "we don't bury or marry?" Anyone know? Well, in the cold weather you can stack them like cord wood but come the Spring something has to be done.
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