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Post by Deleted on Jul 11, 2015 23:07:25 GMT -5
We stayed up last night caring for a little seven year old girl. She was sick. We nearly took her to hospital. Her mother is away for the weekend. This mother married a family member. He is an Engineer whose specialty forced him to go to England for 4 or 5 years . She promised to follow him, but reneged after he left. She said she has to follow her "own career." This "career" is two days journalism for a local newspaper and a few days working for a Real-estate agent, doing, amongst other things, delivering pamphlets. So he's paying the mortgage, and child maintenance now. And often, we care for the girl. This woman is a liberal woman with strident feminist ideals. We find her rather cold.
I hold that a lot of feminism leads to child abuse. It increases the chance of marital separation. I hear all the time of women who split from successful marriages because the woman feels "unfulfilled" - taught that motherhood is a trap and domesticity a chore. Now family breakup happens to half of all households in Australia - it's all normalized, mainstream behavior. And devastating to children - if couples bother to have children. I wonder how many unborn children's lives are terminated because they might interfere with the mother's career? It's called "feminism" in that wonderful Freudian "Projection" way I often mention here. There's little that's "feminine" about most feminists I know. Now we have this child in our care who misses her father terribly. She has nightmares. When her father comes home it's so wonderful, but then there's that fateful day when we all go back to the airport again, and the hysterical screaming starts all over again. Why is CSA so fashionable today? It's always been here. I think it's because we abuse children so much these days, and we are creating a society which increasingly has no place for children, that "protection of children" has become a foil for what we as a society are doing to them.
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Post by Greg on Jul 11, 2015 23:29:28 GMT -5
We stayed up last night caring for a little seven year old girl. She was sick. We nearly took her to hospital. Her mother is away for the weekend. This mother married a family member. He is an Engineer whose specialty forced him to go to England for 4 or 5 years . She promised to follow him, but reneged after he left. She said she has to follow her "own career." This "career" is two days journalism for a local newspaper and a few days working for a Real-estate agent, doing, amongst other things, delivering pamphlets. So he's paying the mortgage, and child maintenance now. And often, we care for the girl. This woman is a liberal woman with strident feminist ideals. We find her rather cold.
I hold that a lot of feminism leads to child abuse. It increases the chance of marital separation. I hear all the time of women who split from successful marriages because the woman feels "unfulfilled" - taught that motherhood is a trap and domesticity a chore. Now family breakup happens to half of all households in Australia - it's all normalized, mainstream behavior. And devastating to children - if couples bother to have children. I wonder how many unborn children's lives are terminated because they might interfere with the mother's career? It's called "feminism" in that wonderful Freudian "Projection" way I often mention here. There's little that's "feminine" about most feminists I know. Now we have this child in our care who misses her father terribly. She has nightmares. When her father comes home it's so wonderful, but then there's that fateful day when we all go back to the airport again, and the hysterical screaming starts all over again. Why is CSA so fashionable today? It's always been here. I think it's because we abuse children so much these days, and we are creating a society which increasingly has no place for children, that "protection of children" has become a foil for what we as a society are doing to them. Bert, are you part of the "We stayed up..."? So, the title asks about csa being a foil and the post mentions "protection of children" as a foil. How is each one "a foil"?
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Post by LouiseKeating on Jul 12, 2015 0:32:41 GMT -5
is a child more important than a career dmmichgood?
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Post by dmmichgood on Jul 12, 2015 0:51:22 GMT -5
BERT, A POX ON YOUR THREAD!
YOU HAVE NO IDEA ABOUT HOW WOMEN SUFFERED IN THE PAST.
YOUR SEXISM IS SO BLATANT!
YOU BLAME THE MOTHER FOR EVERYTHING.
YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO CALL is CSA "fashionable!" "fashionable?"
AND THEN BLAME IT ON THE MOTHER.
YOU HAVEN'T A CLUE AS TO "feminism"MEANS! YOU HAVEN'T A CLUE AS TO WHAT IS Freudian "Projection!"
THAT YOU ARE PREJUDICED AGAINST PEOPLE WITHOUT HAVING A CLUE AS TO THE CIRCUMSTANCES OF THEIR LIVES! YET YOU WON'T ANSWER ANY QUESTIONS ABOUT YOUR OWN LIFE.
YOU MAY BE "PROFESSING" BUT YOU CERTAINLY ARE NOT "POSSESSING" OF THE CARING AND COMPASSIONATE QUALITIES THAT I SEE IN MANY OF THE F&W's THAT I HAVE KNOWN ALL MY LIFE!
THANKFULLY NOT ALL THE F&W's RESEMBLE YOUR ATTITUDE.
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Post by LouiseKeating on Jul 12, 2015 0:55:32 GMT -5
is a child more important than a career dmmichgood?
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Post by Roselyn T on Jul 12, 2015 0:58:36 GMT -5
Bert has no understanding of abuse Dmmg.
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Post by dmmichgood on Jul 12, 2015 0:59:27 GMT -5
is a child more important than a career dmmichgood? What do you think, louisekeating?
You are asking a lot of questions. How about answering some of your own questions first?
Your questions seem to be obviously worded toward some mindset of your own and worded so as to try & put people into corners.
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Post by dmmichgood on Jul 12, 2015 1:00:31 GMT -5
Bert has no understanding of abuse Dmmg. Bert has no understanding of a lot of issues.
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Post by LouiseKeating on Jul 12, 2015 1:01:51 GMT -5
Do you think workers dont answer questions?
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Post by Roselyn T on Jul 12, 2015 1:03:48 GMT -5
Bert has no understanding of abuse Dmmg. Bert has no understanding of a lot of issues.Like single mother for example !
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Post by BobWilliston on Jul 12, 2015 1:06:12 GMT -5
is a child more important than a career dmmichgood? But who's neglecting this child. Leaving a child with relatives to baby sit is nothing close to meaning child abuse -- unless Bert et al were abusing the child themselves,
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Post by LouiseKeating on Jul 12, 2015 1:07:07 GMT -5
If you care for single-parent kids but dont understand them is it because you havent got an education?
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Post by BobWilliston on Jul 12, 2015 1:08:07 GMT -5
Do you think workers dont answer questions? Do you think workers always know what they're talking about when it comes to raising children. Some of them know only what their own abusive parents practiced on them.
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Post by BobWilliston on Jul 12, 2015 1:09:22 GMT -5
If you care for single-parent kids but dont understand them is it because you havent got an education? Quite possibly so.
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Post by Roselyn T on Jul 12, 2015 1:09:52 GMT -5
If you care for single-parent kids but dont understand them is it because you havent got an education? ??
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Post by LouiseKeating on Jul 12, 2015 1:11:10 GMT -5
Do you think workers come from abusive families? Who? I don't know any.
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Post by BobWilliston on Jul 12, 2015 1:12:21 GMT -5
Do you think workers come from abusive families? Who? I don't know any. Well I do -- more than a few, actually. And a lot of workers are abusive themselves.
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Post by Roselyn T on Jul 12, 2015 1:12:57 GMT -5
Do you think workers come from abusive families? Who? I don't know any. So, because you don't know any does that mean none have come from abusive families ?
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Post by LouiseKeating on Jul 12, 2015 1:15:46 GMT -5
If you care for single-parent kids but dont understand them is it because you havent got an education? ?? If someone looks after a single parent child but they dont understand single parent issues - do they have to do some humanity course?
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Post by Greg on Jul 12, 2015 1:16:09 GMT -5
Do you think workers dont answer questions? Do you think workers always know what they're talking about when it comes to raising children. Some of them know only what their own abusive parents practiced on them. A professing couple that could not have kids adopted five of them. None of them professed and each had some dysfunction or deviance from the average professing person . . . jail, drugs, unwed mother, welfare.. An overseer suggested to me that God must know what he's doing when some people can't have kids.
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Post by whyisitso on Jul 12, 2015 1:45:17 GMT -5
?? If someone looks after a single parent child but they dont understand single parent issues - do they have to do some humanity course? i notice 19 out of your 22 posts are questions but you don't like to answer any questions asked of you, but rather 'answer' with another question. Are you a worker?
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Post by whyisitso on Jul 12, 2015 2:03:12 GMT -5
We stayed up last night caring for a little seven year old girl. She was sick. We nearly took her to hospital. Her mother is away for the weekend. This mother married a family member. He is an Engineer whose specialty forced him to go to England for 4 or 5 years . She promised to follow him, but reneged after he left. She said she has to follow her "own career." This "career" is two days journalism for a local newspaper and a few days working for a Real-estate agent, doing, amongst other things, delivering pamphlets. So he's paying the mortgage, and child maintenance now. And often, we care for the girl. This woman is a liberal woman with strident feminist ideals. We find her rather cold.
I hold that a lot of feminism leads to child abuse. It increases the chance of marital separation. I hear all the time of women who split from successful marriages because the woman feels "unfulfilled" - taught that motherhood is a trap and domesticity a chore. Now family breakup happens to half of all households in Australia - it's all normalized, mainstream behavior. And devastating to children - if couples bother to have children. I wonder how many unborn children's lives are terminated because they might interfere with the mother's career? It's called "feminism" in that wonderful Freudian "Projection" way I often mention here. There's little that's "feminine" about most feminists I know. Now we have this child in our care who misses her father terribly. She has nightmares. When her father comes home it's so wonderful, but then there's that fateful day when we all go back to the airport again, and the hysterical screaming starts all over again. Why is CSA so fashionable today? It's always been here. I think it's because we abuse children so much these days, and we are creating a society which increasingly has no place for children, that "protection of children" has become a foil for what we as a society are doing to them. Bert, theres a lot in this post that doesn't add up. Why does her dad HAVE to go to England for 4-5 years? Could he not get a different job and at least live in the same country/state as his little girl? The young years go very fast… it's sad that they are both missing too much. Maybe there's other reasons she doesn't want to go, i don't know because i don't know her or her story. Saying she's very cold is subjective. She might not like you, or she might feel judged by you…. any number of reasons why she might be 'cold' No doubt if you chatted to her best friend they'd tell you a different version of the person she is. It sounds like this is your son and (ex) daughter in law and granddaughter, or equally as close. Blood is always thicker than water, and we will always see our family's side of the story before anyone else's unless they've really messed up. im not sure what the link is to CSA that you're getting at, but really it's like your blaming the mum of this child and the father has no 'location' responsibility…. what about the father putting his career on hold? Why is it always the woman's responsibility? Personally, i'm very happy to be able to stay at home and raise our only child. He's almost 3 and it's my absolute privilege to be with him every day. No we won't be able to afford taking a family holiday to Fiji any time soon, but camping is good I guess tho, i try to understand it's not for everyone. It can be lonely sometimes. I think it takes a stronger mind to do 'my' job than it would be for me to go off to work every day, but again, that's just my opinion. All i'm saying is, it's not just the mothers responsibility! It takes two to make a child!
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Post by BobWilliston on Jul 12, 2015 2:34:52 GMT -5
?? If someone looks after a single parent child but they dont understand single parent issues - do they have to do some humanity course? There's more to education that taking courses. When it comes to parenting there's no better education than a patient loving long-term example. If you don't have that, then get yourself to some professional training -- and start with baby-sitting classes,
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Post by BobWilliston on Jul 12, 2015 2:36:30 GMT -5
Do you think workers always know what they're talking about when it comes to raising children. Some of them know only what their own abusive parents practiced on them. A professing couple that could not have kids adopted five of them. None of them professed and each had some dysfunction or deviance from the average professing person . . . jail, drugs, unwed mother, welfare.. An overseer suggested to me that God must know what he's doing when some people can't have kids. I'd have asked him who parented the freaks in his family.
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Post by fred on Jul 12, 2015 5:48:48 GMT -5
We stayed up last night caring for a little seven year old girl. She was sick. We nearly took her to hospital. Her mother is away for the weekend. This mother married a family member. He is an Engineer whose specialty forced him to go to England for 4 or 5 years . She promised to follow him, but reneged after he left. She said she has to follow her "own career." This "career" is two days journalism for a local newspaper and a few days working for a Real-estate agent, doing, amongst other things, delivering pamphlets. So he's paying the mortgage, and child maintenance now. And often, we care for the girl. This woman is a liberal woman with strident feminist ideals. We find her rather cold.
I hold that a lot of feminism leads to child abuse. It increases the chance of marital separation. I hear all the time of women who split from successful marriages because the woman feels "unfulfilled" - taught that motherhood is a trap and domesticity a chore. Now family breakup happens to half of all households in Australia - it's all normalized, mainstream behavior. And devastating to children - if couples bother to have children. I wonder how many unborn children's lives are terminated because they might interfere with the mother's career? It's called "feminism" in that wonderful Freudian "Projection" way I often mention here. There's little that's "feminine" about most feminists I know. Now we have this child in our care who misses her father terribly. She has nightmares. When her father comes home it's so wonderful, but then there's that fateful day when we all go back to the airport again, and the hysterical screaming starts all over again. Why is CSA so fashionable today? It's always been here. I think it's because we abuse children so much these days, and we are creating a society which increasingly has no place for children, that "protection of children" has become a foil for what we as a society are doing to them. Well, put a cross on the wall ....there is much that I agree with in this post Bert, though not necessarily your conclusion. I think there is something missing here we don't know about in this relationship. Firstly, most young women would jump at a chance to relocate to England for a few years, but then to create a smokescreen about a career? I don't see this as a feminism issue - I know many partnerships where the father has set his working life on hold to become the chief domestic, shouldering the bulk of the child rearing responsibilities. It is plain old pragmatism where the wife earns maybe twice as much as her husband - nothing to do with feminism. However feminism would demand that pragmatism should not be considered in the opposite scenario. Feminism trumps plain old common sense.
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Post by fixit on Jul 12, 2015 5:57:18 GMT -5
Why is CSA so fashionable today? It's always been here. I think it's because we abuse children so much these days, and we are creating a society which increasingly has no place for children, that "protection of children" has become a foil for what we as a society are doing to them. Thankfully, progress in society has resulted from issues becoming "fashionable". The abolition of child labour and the abolition of slavery are two issues that became "fashionable" enough that progress was made.
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Post by What Hat on Jul 12, 2015 10:04:09 GMT -5
We stayed up last night caring for a little seven year old girl. She was sick. We nearly took her to hospital. Her mother is away for the weekend. This mother married a family member. He is an Engineer whose specialty forced him to go to England for 4 or 5 years . She promised to follow him, but reneged after he left. She said she has to follow her "own career." This "career" is two days journalism for a local newspaper and a few days working for a Real-estate agent, doing, amongst other things, delivering pamphlets. So he's paying the mortgage, and child maintenance now. And often, we care for the girl. This woman is a liberal woman with strident feminist ideals. We find her rather cold.
I hold that a lot of feminism leads to child abuse. It increases the chance of marital separation. I hear all the time of women who split from successful marriages because the woman feels "unfulfilled" - taught that motherhood is a trap and domesticity a chore. Now family breakup happens to half of all households in Australia - it's all normalized, mainstream behavior. And devastating to children - if couples bother to have children. I wonder how many unborn children's lives are terminated because they might interfere with the mother's career? It's called "feminism" in that wonderful Freudian "Projection" way I often mention here. There's little that's "feminine" about most feminists I know. Now we have this child in our care who misses her father terribly. She has nightmares. When her father comes home it's so wonderful, but then there's that fateful day when we all go back to the airport again, and the hysterical screaming starts all over again. Why is CSA so fashionable today? It's always been here. I think it's because we abuse children so much these days, and we are creating a society which increasingly has no place for children, that "protection of children" has become a foil for what we as a society are doing to them. Speaking from personal experience and observation, I believe that you generally have to go where your wife wants to be. I don't think you can say that the whole mode of traditional patriarchical life is better or worse than the whole mode of modern feminist-influenced life. They both seem to have their problems. You're comparing CSA in a patriarchy versus child abandonment in the modern divided home. I think we have moved along a bit as a society to understand the serious effects of divorce and separation on young children. I think that's mostly 20 years ago. At least around here I see in the young families that I know, many of whom experienced directly or saw the scenario you describe, a desire to be there for their kids. So they come up with unique solutions - the mother decides to be the income earner if she is a professional, and the father is the primary caregiver. Sure, he can't be a mother, but he can cook, clean and wash diapers. That is just work. Mother can still be a nurturer. Or they both work part-time. Whatever works. I fully recognize that often it doesn't work, and the worst trap and problem, IMO, is better car, bigger house, both of them work their butts off, children are neglected, and one day the entire thing vanishes because actually there's nothing there anymore. It's too bad that this couple couldn't work things out, and sometimes preconceptions about roles cause more problems than they solve.
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Post by What Hat on Jul 12, 2015 10:05:35 GMT -5
is a child more important than a career dmmichgood? No question, a child is more important. So why did he go to England? Should have stayed with the children. I'm not blaming him, because I'm sure there are mitigating circumstances, but I don't believe a father should be in the situation of working in one country while his children and wife are in another. Ideally. We are talking about how things could be better, right?
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