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Post by snow on Jun 24, 2015 16:23:23 GMT -5
I think forgetting doesn't mean you will not remember what happened, but rather it no longer is something you dwell on 24/7 and when you do think about it, it no longer holds any power over you.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2015 16:49:19 GMT -5
Severe physical wounds rarely heal without leaving reminders for the victim. Not only are there scars, there are deep painful reminders, especially as one gets older. I happen to have an 8 inch scar down my chest, even after soon two years, it remains painful, more sometimes than others. Nothing can be done about it. Other injuries from decades ago leave their residual pain also.
So it is with other types of "forgive and forget" injuries. The consequences often last a lifetime. It is obvious to me who has never endured such an injury. Their comments make them stand out like a light in a dark night. So, remember this when you feel compelled to just let the words fly.
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Post by raisininthehotdogend on Jun 24, 2015 17:40:41 GMT -5
The number 7 was seen as the perfect number, but where did Jesus figure 70 from. The number 70 is mentioned in the Old Testament and in the New Testament. In the New Testament it is about the destruction of Jerusalem and is associated with punishment, but in the Old Testament Jerusalem was destroyed by Nebuchadnezzar, who led the jews in exile for 70 years, and God in his grace forgave them completely until they sinned next time. Let us imagine that a humanbeing bullied or belittled 490 times in an hour andforgives each time. What should he do nexttime. 1 hour = 3600 seconds : 490 = 7.3 leading to forgive 1 time every 7 seconds. We all need a spirit of for forgiveness to be able to do so.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2015 17:54:32 GMT -5
Words spoken, especially hurtful words , can never be recalled, one can try to apologies for uttering them, but they can never be recalled. One should always bear that in mind before uttering hurtful words in anger. The same goes for hurtful actions,they inevitably leave a scar.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2015 18:05:26 GMT -5
The Lord clearly did NOT teach if your brother whom you have rebuked does not repent forgive him any way! Should he repent, there should be no end to forgiveness, which is what my understanding of 70x7 means.
People can twist the Lords words however they wish, if I am doing so, then shame on me!
when we ask the Father to forgive our sins as we forgive, surely it is because we are crushed, humbled, broken and repentant! If we do NOT forgive such people, how CAN we expect forgiveness?
Guess others just don't see it that way, but I certainly do!
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Post by rational on Jun 24, 2015 18:56:31 GMT -5
So it is with other types of "forgive and forget" injuries. The consequences often last a lifetime. It is obvious to me who has never endured such an injury. Their comments make them stand out like a light in a dark night. So, remember this when you feel compelled to just let the words fly.Did you consider the possibility that some people may deal with such injuries in a very different way and not, as Horatio commented, wear their hearts on their sleeves? I would suggest that perhaps their comments stand out like a light in the dark to you because they are not reacting the way you would nor the way you expect them to react. To suggest because they are not reacting as you believe/expect they should that they have never endured such an injury does them a great disservice.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 24, 2015 19:01:44 GMT -5
Thanks for responding to this thread. This has been a journey for me over the past few years.
I never really understood forgiveness until I was betrayed by two people who I love dearly. I realized that I was cutting of my nose to spite my face by holding onto my anger. It was then I understood that forgiveness was the only way I could make these relationship work.
Forgiveness for my abuser was a journey that I had to start when I was willing to admit what had happen and seek help from professions. I had prayed for forgiveness and to forget what had happened without ever really acknowledging or understanding just how much the shame, guilt and horror of that secret had effected my every relationship. Once I acknowledged what had happened and received help, then I could move toward forgiveness.
Dennis, I do not think God expects us to keep going back and being hurt by the same people time after time. We do have to have healthy boundaries in our natural and spiritual lives. If an others actions is going to effect our spirit I do believe God would like us to avoid that person.
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bulsi
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WHAT WE DO IN LIFE ECHOES IN ETERNITY !
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Post by bulsi on Jun 24, 2015 20:57:54 GMT -5
How is anyone to grow as a person if their past is forever brought up? Is there any such thing as forgiveness of others past mistakes, on this board or among the friends and workers? The bible says we will be forgiven as we forgive. Do others on this board believe this. There are things that need to be brought to light and there are things that need to be forgotten. I fear some people on this board and in meeting do not ever want to forgive or forget anything. Forgiveness is a gift we give to ourselves when we let things go. Do we want more people associated with "TRUTH" to kill themselves because of what is put on the internet because they fear of what others think of them? Is this board going to hold people responsible for what they did as teenagers when they were immature, for the rest of their lives? We live in a world that has no forgiveness for certain people and all the forgiveness for others depending on how much money they have and what political party they belong to. Have I always forgiven. No. The older I get and the more I see, the more I realize how much forgiveness I need and how can I hold others to a higher standard then myself. As a survivor of childhood sexual abuse the only way I could heal is to forgive. I hope you do not read this as a condemnation of any of you, but as encouragement for you to think about others and their burdens before you add to them. You never know when your added burden will break another person. There are ways to address issues with kindness and compassion even when they are as horrible as abuse.
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Post by bitterbetty on Jun 27, 2015 21:00:33 GMT -5
I know what it's like to feel REPRESSED. It doesn't feel good...you feel as though your heart is going to burst...there is this ache...that's the best way I know how to describe it. And, when there are issues and hurts and wounds that are in need of healing and healing has not really occurred it can turn into a deep-seated WOUND that festers and causes all sorts of problems in the person who is wounded-including ONGOING pain. And, living with pain is a big problem...
But, maybe it is important to point out something (and this is just food for thought): We don't always REALIZE who it is that is [still] WOUNDED. We may think or assume someone is healed and 'all better' and it's all resolved, etc. When in FACT, all that has really happened is that pain is REPRESSED, the person is functioning on a certain level perhaps, but is all bottled up inside and in reality, is still very much wounded and hurting.
It's true that life happens and people get hurt. Maybe the person who inflicted that hurt feels SOOOOO bad about it that they in turn are hurting just as much as the one they hurt...other people who inflict hurt and/or pain don't seem to be as bothered about it.
In the world of mental health and psychology I believe they call it 'stuffing your feelings' as it relates to repression. I agree, it doesn't feel good if we are honest about it and stop denying how we really feel. Not just in churches, (but also in families and workplaces) there is this dysfunctional thing of carrying on as if you are not hurt and keeping a stiff upper lip that is encouraged...That kind of thing may work on the basketball court...(be tough and keep on playing), but is ultimately unhealthy to one's psyche in the world of emotional and mental pain. Personally, I think it is warped to tell folks they shouldn't be offended when in reality someone HAS offended them and hurt them. An offense is an offense. I don't care how one tries to twist things around by saying things like, ".....well, you shouldn't take offense...." The fact of the matter is that people offend and hurt other people. The person who is doing the offending needs to be held accountable. Not holding people accountable is weak. And, sometimes it's much too easy to pretend no offense has occurred than to confront the offender's offending behavior. So, perhaps pretending not to be offended is the easy way out .... (?) Another thing to think about is this: When we hurt others we are really hurting ourselves..In light of that, it's better for all if they do whatever they can NOT to do or say anything that could be hurtful. One poster here said to be careful what you say...not only what you say, but HOW you say it; the spirit with which it is said. But another thing-there is the sin of omission...Sins of omission can be just as hurtful as the other kinds of sins... How many times have you looked back on a situation and wished you had said or done more in a right way (intervened) to help someone as opposed to doing nothing-which could be taken as cold indifference?
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Post by bitterbetty on Jun 27, 2015 21:17:05 GMT -5
Where there is no justice, the people despair.
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Post by Child of God on Jun 28, 2015 7:30:42 GMT -5
Lots of good words here.
I learned about forgiveness via a horrible incident. I understand what pain is. Deep down inside is a pain that in some ways feels good because it justifies our continued reliving, recalling, rehashing. The beauty of forgiveness is that the pain goes away, the focus is on the future, not the past.
The problem is that the one forgiven thinks things should return to "normal." This seems to me to be the biggest thing for all to get past. It will never be "normal" again.
The dynamics of the relationship has changed forever with the introduction of pain. Only the right actions will heal the rift. Those actions must start out of love, then they will grow something. When the forgiver feels the love, there can be healing.
When the forgiver chooses to change the view from the past to the future, that is a big step. This is not repression, this is a conscious choice to change because they know dwelling in the past is accomplishing nothing. I liken this to a natural wound. We bandage it so that it can heal. If we keep it open so we can pick off the scab and show others how bad it is, it will never heal and infection can set in. Infection will only make it worse. Sometimes a support group can be like an infection. Keeping the wound oozing the goo.
Thankful that God can change our focus. God isn't into belittling, accusing, but healing and growing. Spending time in the good book has to me, been a much better healer than sitting with someone digging through the brain struggling with the pain.
Just a few thoughts from my experience.
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Post by kurtzphil69 on Jun 28, 2015 17:53:56 GMT -5
Lots of good words here. I learned about forgiveness via a horrible incident. I understand what pain is. Deep down inside is a pain that in some ways feels good because it justifies our continued reliving, recalling, rehashing. The beauty of forgiveness is that the pain goes away, the focus is on the future, not the past. The problem is that the one forgiven thinks things should return to "normal." This seems to me to be the biggest thing for all to get past. It will never be "normal" again. The dynamics of the relationship has changed forever with the introduction of pain. Only the right actions will heal the rift. Those actions must start out of love, then they will grow something. When the forgiver feels the love, there can be healing. When the forgiver chooses to change the view from the past to the future, that is a big step. This is not repression, this is a conscious choice to change because they know dwelling in the past is accomplishing nothing. I liken this to a natural wound. We bandage it so that it can heal. If we keep it open so we can pick off the scab and show others how bad it is, it will never heal and infection can set in. Infection will only make it worse. Sometimes a support group can be like an infection. Keeping the wound oozing the goo. Thankful that God can change our focus. God isn't into belittling, accusing, but healing and growing. Spending time in the good book has to me, been a much better healer than sitting with someone digging through the brain struggling with the pain. Just a few thoughts from my experience. Thanks COG for sharing what has helped you...Yes, at times it is a matter of changing our focus...(and again, change is required)and sometimes we actually NEED to have someone else help us with our focus and our vision...to point something out that we need to take heed to....I am a believer that God is more than ABLE; definitely willing; and even anxious to assist us in this matter...So I guess my thought to myself is this: PAY ATTENTION....God may be trying to show me something and I completely miss it! The help is there....the pointers are there pointing out a better path....but do I even take NOTICE? HMMMMMM. To be totally honest, sometimes I notice what I should and other times I don't...and there have been times when I have perhaps noticed things I shouldn't (if you know what I mean)...Am I more ready to notice the faults and shortcomings of others-and NOT as ready to notice how I can change for the better?
Keeping our focus and vision on Christ is the key. We have what we have on record that tells us about Christ and I'm very thankful for that.We have the Holy Spirit that is an awesome teacher. I am also thankful that His Spirit is lived out in others which gives them a Christ-like Spirit...being around others with a Christ-like Spirit is like being able to feed off manna from Heaven. That is a beautiful, tangible provision! There are going to be times when we feed off others' Christ-like Spirit and there are going to be times when others will feed off us. If you love and care for others, feed them the Good Food.
Let's revisit that word 'change' (change our focus). Change can be challenging. I know of many folks who simply do not like change....maybe even the thought of change causes them to put up barriers in a knee-jerk, 'Oh-no' type-of-thing. For others, perhaps they really DESIRE to change, but when it comes down to actually DOING it and changing for real...they falter and discover that changing, even if it's for the better, is not coming as easily as they envisioned. This is where I would say yet again, let others HELP*YOU*CHANGE. I have confidence that if we NEED to change (for the better) and we are WILLING to change, God will do more than just meet us half-way and will provide a way and a means to truly change. Also, give positive feedback and encourage people who are making positive changes; it's likely come at a certain cost and effort.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 28, 2015 18:17:34 GMT -5
"The quality of mercy is not strained. It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven Upon the place beneath. It is twice blessed. It blesses him that gives and him that takes ..."
For me, nothing is as liberating as forgiveness. But Jesus said that if you have something against another and you go to that person and he won't hear you, and you go back with two witnesses and he still won't hear you, and you tell the church and nothing is done ... then let him be to thee as a heathen man or a publican.
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Post by xna on Jun 28, 2015 18:39:20 GMT -5
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Post by bitterbetty on Jun 28, 2015 19:18:03 GMT -5
When the forgiver chooses to change the view from the past to the future, that is a big step. This is not repression, this is a conscious choice to change because they know dwelling in the past is accomplishing nothing. I liken this to a natural wound. We bandage it so that it can heal. If we keep it open so we can pick off the scab and show others how bad it is, it will never heal and infection can set in. Infection will only make it worse. Sometimes a support group can be like an infection. Keeping the wound oozing the goo. You bring up dwelling on the past I agree-it's not helpful to dwell, and it's a big time-waster. I am more in favor of learning from the past. We learn lessons as we go along in life. We might be in a place where we can remember something, but instead of dredging up the negative emotions connected with what we went through, we remember the LESSON we learned instead. Do we dwell on the past with a spirit of regret or do we turn it into valuable lessons? I think if we dwell on the past with regret it can lead to depression. You bring up a good point about shifting your focus from past to future...that has it's place, for sure; being able to have some positive anticipation. But, let's not forget, that it is also important to be present in the moment. If you are either thinking too much about the past OR too much about the future, you could be missing some WONDERFUL things that are happening right now.
Memory does have a purpose and some people have lousy memories, which tries my patience at times. But some of us struggle with remembering too much in too much detail and not being able to forget no matter how hard we try. This has been a struggle of mine off and on. Especially when it comes to bad experiences. So, I sometimes wonder: "Why can't I forget?!" I've consciously tried to shift the focus back to the lesson that was learned...and that has been helpful in not repeating the same mistakes over and over. As to wound healing: Many wounds, especially the deep ones need proper healing from the inside>out. So, regardless of what wonderful bandages and dressing we apply to outside, if the INSIDE isn't healing right, well, it's just not going to heal right. Infections are not always prevented by covering up the wound, and a wound can become infected even with the most scrupulous dressing change habits. All the pus, dead tissue, necrotic tissue NEEDS to come out. A wound can heal on the outside surface, but develop an infected abscess underneath with pockets of tunneling. Some bacteria just LOVE warmth and moisture...It's important to get at the source of the infection and get RID of it. Not uncommon to culture the wound so you know just what kind of bug you are dealing, so you can treat it properly. I guess some support groups might feel like a big boo hoo session, but all the negative feelings that plague a person need to come OUT. If they are held in they are likely to create an emotional abscess. Support groups are not for everyone, but very helpful for many in getting things out and offering support/encouragement that you can overcome; you c an win.
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Post by snow on Jun 28, 2015 22:45:08 GMT -5
Now I wonder if he will ask forgiveness from the Cathars? Wonder if they left any alive?
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Post by kurtzphil69 on Jun 28, 2015 23:51:35 GMT -5
As to wound healing: Many wounds, especially the deep ones need proper healing from the inside>out. So, regardless of what wonderful bandages and dressing we apply to outside, if the INSIDE isn't healing right, well, it's just not going to heal right. Infections are not always prevented by covering up the wound, and a wound can become infected even with the most scrupulous dressing change habits. All the pus, dead tissue, necrotic tissue NEEDS to come out. A wound can heal on the outside surface, but develop an infected abscess underneath with pockets of tunneling. Some bacteria just LOVE warmth and moisture...It's important to get at the source of the infection and get RID of it. Not uncommon to culture the wound so you know just what kind of bug you are dealing, so you can treat it properly. I guess some support groups might feel like a big boo hoo session, but all the negative feelings that plague a person need to come OUT. If they are held in they are likely to create an emotional abscess. Support groups are not for everyone, but very helpful for many in getting things out and offering support/encouragement that you can overcome; you c an win. When I had major abdominal surgery a few years back I remember the nurses talking to me about healing. They informed me that I needed to eat a good diet with plenty of protein, get plenty of fluids and rest. They also reminded me that if I was having too much pain, I wouldn't rest and heal up like I should. I was reluctant to ask for pain meds; worried about becoming addicted, etc. But, neither was it good to be laying there in pain. I just could NOT relax while having so much pain. I couldn't get comfortable. Finally I asked for and was given more pain med and it was such a relief! I didn't realize how much I was hurting until the pain was lessened. I was then able to rest and felt better because of it.
Could something similar occur with emotional/mental pain? Traumatic experiences? I think so. Maybe it is that folks who are hurting emotionally and/or mentally need PAIN RELIEF! When they receive pain relief, they can perhaps take a much needed rest from the turmoil and grief they are trying to process. Now, if I can just figure out what a person can do to give emotional/mental pain relief, I might be in business. Could it be that a person cannot truly forgive or find it difficult to forgive while they are still in so much pain?
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2015 3:57:18 GMT -5
Thanks for responding to this thread. This has been a journey for me over the past few years. I never really understood forgiveness until I was betrayed by two people who I love dearly. I realized that I was cutting of my nose to spite my face by holding onto my anger. It was then I understood that forgiveness was the only way I could make these relationship work. Forgiveness for my abuser was a journey that I had to start when I was willing to admit what had happen and seek help from professions. I had prayed for forgiveness and to forget what had happened without ever really acknowledging or understanding just how much the shame, guilt and horror of that secret had effected my every relationship. Once I acknowledged what had happened and received help, then I could move toward forgiveness. Dennis, I do not think God expects us to keep going back and being hurt by the same people time after time. We do have to have healthy boundaries in our natural and spiritual lives. If an others actions is going to effect our spirit I do believe God would like us to avoid that person. Yes, that advice makes good sense.if we know that a particular food does not agree with our system we should avoid it; the same can be applied to our spiritual lives.
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Post by rational on Jun 29, 2015 7:22:38 GMT -5
Now I wonder if he will ask forgiveness from the Cathars? Wonder if they left any alive? Dead of alie makes little difference. Galileo waited for centuries to be acknowledged as being correct.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2015 7:30:06 GMT -5
Re Galileo Said it here before umpteen times... a lot of that Galileo story is just that - a story. Galileo didn't discover the heliocentric system. Galileo didn't invent the telescope. Galileo wasn't the first to use it for astronomy. Galileo couldn't prove the earth moved - and his theory of the tides was dead wrong. Galileo was a celebrity who poked fun at the Pope by using the discoveries of others. Galileo forced to Pope to defend the earth-centric system when no-one really cared. The Catholic Church had funded science, and showed the superiority of Western science to the Chinese.
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Post by rational on Jun 29, 2015 8:32:36 GMT -5
Re Galileo Said it here before umpteen times... a lot of that Galileo story is just that - a story. Galileo didn't discover the heliocentric system. Galileo didn't invent the telescope. Galileo wasn't the first to use it for astronomy. Galileo couldn't prove the earth moved - and his theory of the tides was dead wrong. Galileo was a celebrity who poked fun at the Pope by using the discoveries of others. Galileo forced to Pope to defend the earth-centric system when no-one really cared. The Catholic Church had funded science, and showed the superiority of Western science to the Chinese. I believe all I said was that Pope John Paul II, the Vatican, said that Galileo was right 350 years after he had been condemned by the church.
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Post by Deleted on Jun 29, 2015 8:37:05 GMT -5
Quote - "I believe all I said was that Pope John Paul II, the Vatican, said that Galileo was right 350 years after he had been condemned by the church."
But like most debates, we all want to bypass the subtleties and nuances of the argument.
As an aside. One argument against Galileo et al was that a purely mechanistic view of the creation will lead to a atheistic, narcissistic and nihilistic world. I think the church nailed that one pretty good. And what shattered the optimism of Europe in the 20th Century was the realization that the humanistic promises of scientific, industrial and philosophical progress weren't leading to a better world at all.
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Post by rational on Jun 29, 2015 8:45:28 GMT -5
Quote - "I believe all I said was that Pope John Paul II, the Vatican, said that Galileo was right 350 years after he had been condemned by the church." But like most debates, we all want to bypass the subtleties and nuances of the argument. I don't think it has ever been suggested that I wanted to bypass any details! I usually get the opposite complaint. The subject of this thread is Forgiveness and this example was of the amount of time it takes some people/organizations to get around to admitting they were in error. Yeah - but it is taking much to long!
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Post by bitterbetty on Jul 1, 2015 14:25:36 GMT -5
Maybe this thread should be entitled: "Unforgiveness" Unforgiveness can be a stubborn 'ill' to cure. Reminds me of some diseases that can be treated, but very very difficult to cure and maybe never really totally and completely cured. How each person (finally) arrives at forgiveness is a unique path to the individual. As friends and supporters of one who has been hurt, offended, wounded, injured, what can be done to help that person? Is it truly helpful to just tell them: "Well, you have to forgive or you won't be forgiven."? And then proceed to fail to give them some real usable ideas on how to arrive at forgiveness. Yes, we know that they need to forgive and it is BEST for them if they do. But, maybe some just don't know HOW...HMMMMMM..... As a nurse if I walk into a patient's room and say something like, "You need to get out of bed and walk. It will be good for you." But I fail to assist them as needed in getting out of bed and walking, that would make me a pretty lousy nurse. (just something to think about.) Also, how I say things to the patient and the kind spirit I have when I say it can either be off-putting or inspiring. And so, I find it kind of sad almost when someone just preaches about "you need to do this and you need to do that", but they don't give real help on how to get through that process. Genuine forgiving, I think, is a process in the case of many people. The deeper the hurt, perhaps the more intricate the process. I think MOST people have heard the line enough and read about it in Scripture to know that they need to somehow forgive. BUT, maybe they STILL find it hard to forgive, as much as they may be trying earnestly to do so. Unforgiveness can be a stubborn thing to finally let go of. Just as some sins are hard to overcome. And, YES, we know that a person is truly better off if they let go of unforgiveness. It is liberating. It brings healing and returns a person back to being whole. While there is yet unforgiveness harbored in a person it is like they have a hole in their heart. So, how to fix that hole...? In my heart as I've searched this subject I have come to believe that the one who cannot forgive is perhaps still hurting too much. So, then, maybe the greater question for a friend or support person would be: "How can I help ease this person's suffering for how they have been hurt?"
As a long time nurse, I've taken care of sooooo many folks who are suffering. And, I've also taken care of the loved ones and families of those who are suffering as they suffer to an extent right along with the patient. There have been times when the patient is stuck with a condition that so far has not been healed/cured. In these cases, we do what we can to treat the symptoms and ease the suffering, all the while not giving up on trying find a cure and bring about as much optimal healing as possible.
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Post by kurtzphil69 on Jul 1, 2015 16:15:15 GMT -5
As to wound healing: Many wounds, especially the deep ones need proper healing from the inside>out. So, regardless of what wonderful bandages and dressing we apply to outside, if the INSIDE isn't healing right, well, it's just not going to heal right. Infections are not always prevented by covering up the wound, and a wound can become infected even with the most scrupulous dressing change habits. All the pus, dead tissue, necrotic tissue NEEDS to come out. A wound can heal on the outside surface, but develop an infected abscess underneath with pockets of tunneling. Some bacteria just LOVE warmth and moisture...It's important to get at the source of the infection and get RID of it. Not uncommon to culture the wound so you know just what kind of bug you are dealing, so you can treat it properly. I guess some support groups might feel like a big boo hoo session, but all the negative feelings that plague a person need to come OUT. If they are held in they are likely to create an emotional abscess. Support groups are not for everyone, but very helpful for many in getting things out and offering support/encouragement that you can overcome; you c an win. When I had major abdominal surgery a few years back I remember the nurses talking to me about healing. They informed me that I needed to eat a good diet with plenty of protein, get plenty of fluids and rest. They also reminded me that if I was having too much pain, I wouldn't rest and heal up like I should. I was reluctant to ask for pain meds; worried about becoming addicted, etc. But, neither was it good to be laying there in pain. I just could NOT relax while having so much pain. I couldn't get comfortable. Finally I asked for and was given more pain med and it was such a relief! I didn't realize how much I was hurting until the pain was lessened. I was then able to rest and felt better because of it.
Could something similar occur with emotional/mental pain? Traumatic experiences? I think so. Maybe it is that folks who are hurting emotionally and/or mentally need PAIN RELIEF! When they receive pain relief, they can perhaps take a much needed rest from the turmoil and grief they are trying to process. Now, if I can just figure out what a person can do to give emotional/mental pain relief, I might be in business. Could it be that a person cannot truly forgive or find it difficult to forgive while they are still in so much pain?
A searching question! What can be done to ease the pain/suffering in someone who has emotional, spiritual, mental wound(s)? I'm going to think about this and get back to it.
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Post by bitterbetty on Jul 1, 2015 19:39:38 GMT -5
Maybe it is that folks who are hurting emotionally and/or mentally need PAIN RELIEF! When they receive pain relief, they can perhaps take a much needed rest from the turmoil and grief they are trying to process. Now, if I can just figure out what a person can do to give emotional/mental pain relief, I might be in business. Could it be that a person cannot truly forgive or find it difficult to forgive while they are still in so much pain?
A searching question! What can be done to ease the pain/suffering in someone who has emotional, spiritual, mental wound(s)? I'm going to think about this and get back to it. Agreed, regarding healing and pain relief. Studies have shown that people who are hurt, injured, or just had surgery heal better when their pain is well managed. Interested to see what ideas you have about relieving emotional pain. I am laboring with an understanding that emotional pain is another way to say 'hurt feelings'.
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Post by snow on Jul 1, 2015 20:37:46 GMT -5
A searching question! What can be done to ease the pain/suffering in someone who has emotional, spiritual, mental wound(s)? I'm going to think about this and get back to it. Agreed, regarding healing and pain relief. Studies have shown that people who are hurt, injured, or just had surgery heal better when their pain is well managed. Interested to see what ideas you have about relieving emotional pain. I am laboring with an understanding that emotional pain is another way to say 'hurt feelings'. It could be 'hurt feelings' but it's much more than that. It can be grief from a loss and that can expand into so many reasons for the loss. Loss of a way of life, loss of a loved one etc. I really am not sure there is anything anyone can do for someone else to help relieve emotional pain. Physical pain is a challenge never mind emotional pain. Numbing doesn't take care of issues it just makes you not care so much about issues. Personally I think emotional pain is a very solitary place to be and your recovery is a very unique and individual process that only that person can achieve. People standing by while the person resolves things does make it somewhat easier though.
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Post by rational on Jul 1, 2015 20:45:07 GMT -5
Agreed, regarding healing and pain relief. Studies have shown that people who are hurt, injured, or just had surgery heal better when their pain is well managed. [/dealing with physical pain takes a lot of energy. Eliminating the pain means more resources are available for physical healing. Interested to see what ideas you have about relieving emotional pain. I am laboring with an understanding that emotional pain is another way to say 'hurt feelings'. Getting rid of 'emotional pain' will improve a person's well being. Unfortunately many people feel the need to reflect on painful experiences, going over events in their minds, trying to sort out the emotional experience but instead of relief end up angrier and more agitated with the details of the event potentially becoming more distorted with every recall. The urge to ruminate needs to be curtailed. Brooding about past slights/injuries accomplishes nothing.
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