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Post by bitterbetty on Mar 4, 2015 22:35:17 GMT -5
I had an experience about a month ago that has really stayed with me and changed me. Changed how I view (some) other people and really restored my faith that there still are good people in the world and there really are people who care, regardless of what you are going through and how pathetic you might be at the time. I fell down in the park. And luckily didn't hit my head or break anything, but a fall is a fall and I remember what it felt like to meet theground like that unintended; the impact.
But what IMPACTED me more was the people who helped me that day who did not need to, but did anyway and HOW they did it. It was truly amazing. Complete strangers stopped to help me. ME! I usually don't need any help. But, I did that day, and they were there. A doctor and his wife just happened to be driving by and saw me down. They stopped and well, he pretty much took appropriate control of the situation and did what needed to be done. I was disoriented, dazed, and confused. Despite that, he was able to keep talking to me throughout the ordeal and give me some reassurance and then he drove me to ER for a full evaluation. The folks in ER were awesome too and the care/concern for my well being went way way beyond mere curiosity/duty. At least, that's how it felt to me. I was so touched by their ministering that I started crying. This, of course prompted them to suspect I was in pain, but I wasn't in pain, I was just so touched.
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Post by Lee on Mar 4, 2015 23:23:59 GMT -5
Upon my observations of the world there are caring people all around us. Our experiences bear this out under some circumstances, in others not. Where we can afford it, sustainable generosity is good policy.
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Post by BobWilliston on Mar 4, 2015 23:45:56 GMT -5
Then again, if you can't afford it, just forget it. Sometimes I just can't help it.
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Post by placid-void on Mar 5, 2015 3:16:42 GMT -5
How are you feeling now, bitterbetty? Hope you are feeling much better and getting around OK.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 5, 2015 3:44:09 GMT -5
I had an experience about a month ago that has really stayed with me and changed me. Changed how I view (some) other people and really restored my faith that there still are good people in the world and there really are people who care, regardless of what you are going through and how pathetic you might be at the time. I fell down in the park. And luckily didn't hit my head or break anything, but a fall is a fall and I remember what it felt like to meet theground like that unintended; the impact. But what IMPACTED me more was the people who helped me that day who did not need to, but did anyway and HOW they did it. It was truly amazing. Complete strangers stopped to help me. ME! I usually don't need any help. But, I did that day, and they were there. A doctor and his wife just happened to be driving by and saw me down. They stopped and well, he pretty much took appropriate control of the situation and did what needed to be done. I was disoriented, dazed, and confused. Despite that, he was able to keep talking to me throughout the ordeal and give me some reassurance and then he drove me to ER for a full evaluation. The folks in ER were awesome too and the care/concern for my well being went way way beyond mere curiosity/duty. At least, that's how it felt to me. I was so touched by their ministering that I started crying. This, of course prompted them to suspect I was in pain, but I wasn't in pain, I was just so touched. Sorry that you suffered a fall and I hope that you are ok now. Sometimes these kind of experiences bring us down to earth so to speak, and we realized that there are good people and bad people around us, and the good people come out of the wood work on occasions like these, I like to think of them as "the good Samaritans" in life.
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Post by bitterbetty on Mar 5, 2015 11:22:53 GMT -5
I had an experience about a month ago that has really stayed with me and changed me. Changed how I view (some) other people and really restored my faith that there still are good people in the world and there really are people who care, regardless of what you are going through and how pathetic you might be at the time. I fell down in the park. And luckily didn't hit my head or break anything, but a fall is a fall and I remember what it felt like to meet theground like that unintended; the impact. But what IMPACTED me more was the people who helped me that day who did not need to, but did anyway and HOW they did it. It was truly amazing. Complete strangers stopped to help me. ME! I usually don't need any help. But, I did that day, and they were there. A doctor and his wife just happened to be driving by and saw me down. They stopped and well, he pretty much took appropriate control of the situation and did what needed to be done. I was disoriented, dazed, and confused. Despite that, he was able to keep talking to me throughout the ordeal and give me some reassurance and then he drove me to ER for a full evaluation. The folks in ER were awesome too and the care/concern for my well being went way way beyond mere curiosity/duty. At least, that's how it felt to me. I was so touched by their ministering that I started crying. This, of course prompted them to suspect I was in pain, but I wasn't in pain, I was just so touched. Sorry that you suffered a fall and I hope that you are ok now. Sometimes these kind of experiences bring us down to earth so to speak, and we realized that there are good people and bad people around us, and the good people come out of the wood work on occasions like these, I like to think of them as "the good Samaritans" in life. So true, partaker! In fact, I told the doctor that he was being a good true Samaritan and he said to me, "Well, you would probably do the same thing." I remember also that his wife moved to the back seat of their van so I could take the front seat. I protested some saying, "I can sit in the back; she should stay in the front." But, again, they BOTH insisted I ride in the front and reassured me that it was for the best. Going through this experience has opened some more doors for me and revealed to me a few things: what really matters; how it feels to fall down and not be able to get up on your own and humbly accepting the kindness of strangers. And, they were VERY kind. I cannot repay them; no way and he won't send me a bill for what he did. But, maybe I can just be as kind as he was when I have the opportunity to do so. Maybe that's the greatest lesson I needed to learn.... When you see that someone is down or 'down', do what you can to lift them up. This could be literally physically down OR mentally/emotionally down. Perhaps the other lesson I needed to learn is to just submit to the care of others caring for you. That is not easy for me! I've always prided myself in being able to take care of myself...
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Post by bitterbetty on Mar 5, 2015 11:31:25 GMT -5
How are you feeling now, bitterbetty? Hope you are feeling much better and getting around OK. Oh, I'm fine. Of course that's what I said right after the fall and it was in no way true; thus the trip to ER. But, I'm all recovered from whatever it was (?) that caused me to fall. That Dr. was really concerned and kept saying to me, "I'm very worried about you." I've had a bunch of tests done, and so far everything has turned out normal.
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Post by snow on Mar 5, 2015 12:02:29 GMT -5
Sorry that you suffered a fall and I hope that you are ok now. Sometimes these kind of experiences bring us down to earth so to speak, and we realized that there are good people and bad people around us, and the good people come out of the wood work on occasions like these, I like to think of them as "the good Samaritans" in life. So true, partaker! In fact, I told the doctor that he was being a good true Samaritan and he said to me, "Well, you would probably do the same thing." I remember also that his wife moved to the back seat of their van so I could take the front seat. I protested some saying, "I can sit in the back; she should stay in the front." But, again, they BOTH insisted I ride in the front and reassured me that it was for the best. Going through this experience has opened some more doors for me and revealed to me a few things: what really matters; how it feels to fall down and not be able to get up on your own and humbly accepting the kindness of strangers. And, they were VERY kind. I cannot repay them; no way and he won't send me a bill for what he did. But, maybe I can just be as kind as he was when I have the opportunity to do so. Maybe that's the greatest lesson I needed to learn.... When you see that someone is down or 'down', do what you can to lift them up. This could be literally physically down OR mentally/emotionally down. Perhaps the other lesson I needed to learn is to just submit to the care of others caring for you. That is not easy for me! I've always prided myself in being able to take care of myself... Pay it forward is a great concept. More and more people are doing that right now. Paying for someone's coffee next in line etc. I am hopeful when I see this becoming more common. It can change someone's life to realize that total strangers do care and are willing to help. Our world has created an isolated population in the middle of a crowd. I'm glad you are okay and hope they find the reason why you fell in the first place.
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Post by CherieKropp on Mar 5, 2015 12:49:16 GMT -5
Your experience caused me to stop and think back on a few times when people went way beyond the call of duty to help me or my family in distressed situations.
They are precious memories...and still give me warm fuzzies when I think of them.
And I dont even know their names!
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Post by bitterbetty on Mar 5, 2015 13:34:36 GMT -5
So true, partaker! In fact, I told the doctor that he was being a good true Samaritan and he said to me, "Well, you would probably do the same thing." I remember also that his wife moved to the back seat of their van so I could take the front seat. I protested some saying, "I can sit in the back; she should stay in the front." But, again, they BOTH insisted I ride in the front and reassured me that it was for the best. Going through this experience has opened some more doors for me and revealed to me a few things: what really matters; how it feels to fall down and not be able to get up on your own and humbly accepting the kindness of strangers. And, they were VERY kind. I cannot repay them; no way and he won't send me a bill for what he did. But, maybe I can just be as kind as he was when I have the opportunity to do so. Maybe that's the greatest lesson I needed to learn.... When you see that someone is down or 'down', do what you can to lift them up. This could be literally physically down OR mentally/emotionally down. Perhaps the other lesson I needed to learn is to just submit to the care of others caring for you. That is not easy for me! I've always prided myself in being able to take care of myself... Pay it forward is a great concept. More and more people are doing that right now. Paying for someone's coffee next in line etc. I am hopeful when I see this becoming more common. It can change someone's life to realize that total strangers do care and are willing to help. Our world has created an isolated population in the middle of a crowd. I'm glad you are okay and hope they find the reason why you fell in the first place. Amen, snow. I agree, pay it forward. Well, in some cases, that is the best option left for one to take and I've always been challenged to seek the less selfish path as I am inclined to be a selfish person...To what I've bolded, I couldn't agree more. And while I like my smart phone and computer access as much as the next person, I wonder how much these things have contributed to the isolation with people becoming less hands on and more techno/hands-off.
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Post by snow on Mar 5, 2015 13:42:57 GMT -5
Pay it forward is a great concept. More and more people are doing that right now. Paying for someone's coffee next in line etc. I am hopeful when I see this becoming more common. It can change someone's life to realize that total strangers do care and are willing to help. Our world has created an isolated population in the middle of a crowd. I'm glad you are okay and hope they find the reason why you fell in the first place. Amen, snow. I agree, pay it forward. Well, in some cases, that is the best option left for one to take and I've always been challenged to seek the less selfish path as I am inclined to be a selfish person...To what I've bolded, I couldn't agree more. And while I like my smart phone and computer access as much as the next person, I wonder how much these things have contributed to the isolation with people becoming less hands on and more techno/hands-off. Yes I imagine it has created a more techno link up with society than a face to face. But for those who were always no good in a group, they have a place to express themselves through social media. So while it may cut down face to face time among those who would have done that in the past, it has opened up a whole new world for those who are less comfortable around others. It allows them a 'safe' place to be part of a conversation. So like anything else, there are pro's and con's to all our technology.
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Post by bitterbetty on Mar 5, 2015 13:54:27 GMT -5
Amen, snow. I agree, pay it forward. Well, in some cases, that is the best option left for one to take and I've always been challenged to seek the less selfish path as I am inclined to be a selfish person...To what I've bolded, I couldn't agree more. And while I like my smart phone and computer access as much as the next person, I wonder how much these things have contributed to the isolation with people becoming less hands on and more techno/hands-off. Yes I imagine it has created a more techno link up with society than a face to face. But for those who were always no good in a group, they have a place to express themselves through social media. So while it may cut down face to face time among those who would have done that in the past, it has opened up a whole new world for those who are less comfortable around others. It allows them a 'safe' place to be part of a conversation. So like anything else, there are pro's and con's to all our technology. Good points! There is a part of me that is old fashioned and wishes to preserve some of the old ways that are good things. But, I sure to like modern conveniences and wonder how we would do without them! Thanks for your care/concern/kindness. i don't know if we will ever know for sure why I fell, but my thyroid has been off/ undertreated recently and that takes some time to correct. I've battled with fatigue and weakness. Low thyroid is the pits. It's like you are not truly sick sick, but you feel crappy anyways and it can manifest in so many ways and symptoms. *Sigh*
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Post by snow on Mar 5, 2015 14:23:23 GMT -5
Yes I imagine it has created a more techno link up with society than a face to face. But for those who were always no good in a group, they have a place to express themselves through social media. So while it may cut down face to face time among those who would have done that in the past, it has opened up a whole new world for those who are less comfortable around others. It allows them a 'safe' place to be part of a conversation. So like anything else, there are pro's and con's to all our technology. Good points! There is a part of me that is old fashioned and wishes to preserve some of the old ways that are good things. But, I sure to like modern conveniences and wonder how we would do without them! Thanks for your care/concern/kindness. i don't know if we will ever know for sure why I fell, but my thyroid has been off/ undertreated recently and that takes some time to correct. I've battled with fatigue and weakness. Low thyroid is the pits. It's like you are not truly sick sick, but you feel crappy anyways and it can manifest in so many ways and symptoms. *Sigh* Well I'm glad you had the tests so you at least can have some peace of mind. That's important.
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Post by kurtzphil69 on Mar 5, 2015 15:26:22 GMT -5
Pay it forward is a great concept. More and more people are doing that right now. Paying for someone's coffee next in line etc. I am hopeful when I see this becoming more common. It can change someone's life to realize that total strangers do care and are willing to help. Our world has created an isolated population in the middle of a crowd. I'm glad you are okay and hope they find the reason why you fell in the first place. Amen, snow. I agree, pay it forward. Well, in some cases, that is the best option left for one to take and I've always been challenged to seek the less selfish path as I am inclined to be a selfish person...To what I've bolded, I couldn't agree more. And while I like my smart phone and computer access as much as the next person, I wonder how much these things have contributed to the isolation with people becoming less hands on and more techno/hands-off. As to being selfish:-Sure, being too selfish can be not so good, but there are times when it's okay to be a bit selfish in that you need to take care of yourself. People and the demands of life, etc can take from you like they are "bucket dippers". You've got a bucket of water and they take the dipper and can slowly but surely dip out your water. Now, that is all part of dealing with people and caring for people and stuff, but you've got to get that water replenished somehow or you will be dipped dry like the water is sucked right out of you. Some people will dip from your bucket, but they will also replenish it in kind. Other people mainly just dip and dip and dip and they do not really replenish. Perhaps these are the times when it's okay to go ahead and be selfish for your own good.
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Post by bitterbetty on Mar 5, 2015 15:53:14 GMT -5
Amen, snow. I agree, pay it forward. Well, in some cases, that is the best option left for one to take and I've always been challenged to seek the less selfish path as I am inclined to be a selfish person...To what I've bolded, I couldn't agree more. And while I like my smart phone and computer access as much as the next person, I wonder how much these things have contributed to the isolation with people becoming less hands on and more techno/hands-off. As to being selfish:-Sure, being too selfish can be not so good, but there are times when it's okay to be a bit selfish in that you need to take care of yourself. People and the demands of life, etc can take from you like they are "bucket dippers". You've got a bucket of water and they take the dipper and can slowly but surely dip out your water. Now, that is all part of dealing with people and caring for people and stuff, but you've got to get that water replenished somehow or you will be dipped dry like the water is sucked right out of you. Some people will dip from your bucket, but they will also replenish it in kind. Other people mainly just dip and dip and dip and they do not really replenish. Perhaps these are the times when it's okay to go ahead and be selfish for your own good. Sigh. So true. Well, I AM grateful to be living in a time and age when there is really more help available than a person even realizes. I feel for folks who need help and cannot seem to get it. I am VERY fortunate right now to be in an environment that can dip the water out of me at times, but there are ways to replenish and people who are supportive and caring as well as replenishing! Part of my ongoing endeavors is to just be able to ask for help when I need it before it's gotten to late and I feel too drained. Don't be afraid to speak up honestly. Do I want to be a whiner? Of course not. But neither do I want to suffer in silence and slowly deteriorate. Sometimes people can be so low, they don't even have enough energy to find help or ask for it. They may not even know where to START. As a nurse, you recognize these symptoms in your patients all the time and try to intervene sooner than later, hopefully. But nurses sometimes take care of theirselves LAST and that is probably not very healthy; it takes its toll.
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Post by BobWilliston on Mar 5, 2015 16:17:57 GMT -5
I got a good picture of the people who live in our community the day I brought my wife home from the hospital. She fainted in the parking lot in front of our condo and I couldn't revive her, much less get her up. Before I knew it a car with a mother and teen-daughter had stopped to help, and three people had come from neighboring buildings to help, and soon another man arrived with a wheelchair and they got her up, brought her into the house, and helped her into her easy chair. She remembers nothing before being in her chair with neighbors all there and concerned about her.
How could they have known how serious her condition was before they stopped to help. She'd almost died of a severe bacterial pneumonia a month earlier and had been on oxygen ever since -- 15 months and counting. I think too many people these days are too afraid of befriending their neighbors that they don't even know when they can be of help to each other.
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Post by bubbles on Mar 5, 2015 20:48:30 GMT -5
On the street? Anyone who shows kindness compassion love understand help is a minister to another person. In a church? Those who are called to a specific role. Plus all of the above. All believers have an anointing from Christ.
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Post by dmmichgood on Mar 6, 2015 2:24:03 GMT -5
I got a good picture of the people who live in our community the day I brought my wife home from the hospital. She fainted in the parking lot in front of our condo and I couldn't revive her, much less get her up. Before I knew it a car with a mother and teen-daughter had stopped to help, and three people had come from neighboring buildings to help, and soon another man arrived with a wheelchair and they got her up, brought her into the house, and helped her into her easy chair. She remembers nothing before being in her chair with neighbors all there and concerned about her. How could they have known how serious her condition was before they stopped to help. She'd almost died of a severe bacterial pneumonia a month earlier and had been on oxygen ever since -- 15 months and counting. I think too many people these days are too afraid of befriending their neighbors that they don't even know when they can be of help to each other. I'm sorry to hear that your wife is still so ill, Bob.
It is good to know there are people that are willing to help.
It would be that way in my own town as well, (even with all the "liberal" bumper stickers all over my car! )
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Post by BobWilliston on Mar 6, 2015 3:04:57 GMT -5
I got a good picture of the people who live in our community the day I brought my wife home from the hospital. She fainted in the parking lot in front of our condo and I couldn't revive her, much less get her up. Before I knew it a car with a mother and teen-daughter had stopped to help, and three people had come from neighboring buildings to help, and soon another man arrived with a wheelchair and they got her up, brought her into the house, and helped her into her easy chair. She remembers nothing before being in her chair with neighbors all there and concerned about her. How could they have known how serious her condition was before they stopped to help. She'd almost died of a severe bacterial pneumonia a month earlier and had been on oxygen ever since -- 15 months and counting. I think too many people these days are too afraid of befriending their neighbors that they don't even know when they can be of help to each other. I'm sorry to hear that your wife is still so ill, Bob.
It is good to know there are people that are willing to help.
It would be that way in my own town as well, (even with all the "liberal" bumper stickers all over my car! )
She's much improved, of course. But she needs a knee replacement and can't have one until the oxygen doctor takes her off the oxygen. In the meantime she has to deal with the pain, difficulty moving about, and being tethered to an oxygen compressor. hopefully by June she can get off the oxygen.
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Post by bitterbetty on Mar 6, 2015 14:13:11 GMT -5
I got a good picture of the people who live in our community the day I brought my wife home from the hospital. She fainted in the parking lot in front of our condo and I couldn't revive her, much less get her up. Before I knew it a car with a mother and teen-daughter had stopped to help, and three people had come from neighboring buildings to help, and soon another man arrived with a wheelchair and they got her up, brought her into the house, and helped her into her easy chair. She remembers nothing before being in her chair with neighbors all there and concerned about her. How could they have known how serious her condition was before they stopped to help. She'd almost died of a severe bacterial pneumonia a month earlier and had been on oxygen ever since -- 15 months and counting. I think too many people these days are too afraid of befriending their neighbors that they don't even know when they can be of help to each other. That sounds stressful Bob! But, nice to find out there are good neighbors who will just dive in and help. That's awesome. We live in a neighborhood that is like that; people reach out to one another and are there to help. It's one reason we have stayed here as long as we have. You never know who your next neighbors will be...My husband has always been especially good at getting to know the neighbors; being there; helping out with no obligations attached; he's very handy and is such a great helper in fixing things that need to be fixed or helping with moving things that need to be moved...or loaning tools and things...
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Post by Lee on Mar 6, 2015 23:56:03 GMT -5
Then again, if you can't afford it, just forget it. Sometimes I just can't help it. Not sure what's funny. In offering their lives the working poor are the most generous of all people.
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Post by BobWilliston on Mar 7, 2015 0:07:41 GMT -5
Then again, if you can't afford it, just forget it. Sometimes I just can't help it. Not sure what's funny. In offering their lives the working poor are the most generous of all people. I'm relieved. I was actually afraid you'd "get it".
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Post by Lee on Mar 7, 2015 0:20:18 GMT -5
No worries. Not all can be poor, not all can be rich. Its a privilege to be alive!
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Post by Deleted on Mar 7, 2015 8:18:44 GMT -5
I got a good picture of the people who live in our community the day I brought my wife home from the hospital. She fainted in the parking lot in front of our condo and I couldn't revive her, much less get her up. Before I knew it a car with a mother and teen-daughter had stopped to help, and three people had come from neighboring buildings to help, and soon another man arrived with a wheelchair and they got her up, brought her into the house, and helped her into her easy chair. She remembers nothing before being in her chair with neighbors all there and concerned about her. How could they have known how serious her condition was before they stopped to help. She'd almost died of a severe bacterial pneumonia a month earlier and had been on oxygen ever since -- 15 months and counting. I think too many people these days are too afraid of befriending their neighbors that they don't even know when they can be of help to each other. There is much truth in what you have written I recall an incident on a bus,public transport where a black conductor tried to assist an elderly woman on to the bus and for his effort she shouted at him " take your filthy black hands off me" to the embarrassment of other people on the bus. So yes some people are afraid of befriending neighbours black and white because of attitudes.i have heard similar stories/experiences told by black friends working as nurses in Hospitals too. I recall visiting Wales many years ago and walking down a street a lady was in her front garden pottering about and I greeted her "good morning" and her response was " what is so good about it, do you know me, have we ever met? " and I thought, sod you, miserable old git"
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Post by bubbles on Mar 7, 2015 11:46:44 GMT -5
People generally pull together in an emergency. Bob Im sorry to hear about your wife. I hope she improves quickly.
BB I know what its like to injure yourself and the appreciation of people helping you. I think independence is sometimes a thing we take for granted and dont consider until an injury occurs. Im pleased you are ok.
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Post by dmmichgood on Mar 7, 2015 16:58:48 GMT -5
As to being selfish:-Sure, being too selfish can be not so good, but there are times when it's okay to be a bit selfish in that you need to take care of yourself. People and the demands of life, etc can take from you like they are "bucket dippers". You've got a bucket of water and they take the dipper and can slowly but surely dip out your water. Now, that is all part of dealing with people and caring for people and stuff, but you've got to get that water replenished somehow or you will be dipped dry like the water is sucked right out of you. Some people will dip from your bucket, but they will also replenish it in kind. Other people mainly just dip and dip and dip and they do not really replenish. Perhaps these are the times when it's okay to go ahead and be selfish for your own good. Kurtzphil69, I don't think that it is being "selfish" to take care of yourself.
I agree I have known some people, in particular a cousin of mine, who everyone depended on and she just seemed to feel she had to do for them.
Some of us could see how she needed to take care of herself & enjoy her own life a bit more.
I think that we finally convinced her, she took some bus trips to places she enjoyed with senior groups.
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Post by bitterbetty on Mar 11, 2015 15:12:07 GMT -5
BB I know what its like to injure yourself and the appreciation of people helping you. I think independence is sometimes a thing we take for granted and dont consider until an injury occurs. Im pleased you are ok.Awww, bubbles-thanks. I am glad to be okay too. A fall could cause various injuries and over the years as a nurse I have taken care of numerous folks who ended up with various injuries because of a fall-some of those injuries were life-changing and even devastating. I've known people who fell and hit their head, causing head injuries so severe they had permanent brain damage. So, I feel very fortunate and it was a sobering experience. Incidentally, the doctor that helped me that day also called me the next day to check on me and made me promise to follow up with my primary Dr. In my mind, calling me up like that was just another way in which he went the extra mile... Yes, I highly value my independence and have always had an independent streak. This has its pro's and con's. I think it's good to be independent and not rely on others too much, & I've never really relied on others too much. But, on the other hand, maybe I'm a bit proud in that regard....the whole experience was rather humbling & could have also been humiliating, but the folks that helped me did not do anything that might humiliate me and for me that is rather significant. Dr.'s and nurses often take care of people who are already down in one way or another. The patient may already be feeling bad. One can add to the bad feelings and contribute to humiliation...or they can finds ways to LIFT people UP. It can be challenging for sure, but lifting others up is an amazing thing.
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Post by Jason Storebo on Mar 11, 2015 16:32:58 GMT -5
Why, just the other day at the VA, the lady ahead of me in the line, spontaineously paid for my lunch.
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