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Aug 8, 2015 18:54:24 GMT -5
Post by BobWilliston on Aug 8, 2015 18:54:24 GMT -5
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Post by rational on Aug 8, 2015 19:33:58 GMT -5
I never expected to see that posted on the internet. I was told that the negative had been destroyed. The indiscretions of youth will always catch up with you!
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Post by xna on Aug 8, 2015 20:12:49 GMT -5
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Aug 8, 2015 20:27:25 GMT -5
Post by xna on Aug 8, 2015 20:27:25 GMT -5
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Aug 9, 2015 1:13:06 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2015 1:13:06 GMT -5
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Aug 9, 2015 7:35:55 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2015 7:35:55 GMT -5
Reckon a lot of those Walmart pictures are staged. But I went there for the first time - camera ready, and I wasn't disappointed.
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Aug 9, 2015 11:10:45 GMT -5
Post by snow on Aug 9, 2015 11:10:45 GMT -5
Reckon a lot of those Walmart pictures are staged. But I went there for the first time - camera ready, and I wasn't disappointed. Lol Bert, you'll have to post a few! Yes I have seen some pretty amazing things in Walmarts across the US. They let Motor homes park on their lots for free so we have used them from time to time if it's been a long day and just want to stop and sleep. Most of them are 24 hour so go in to get groceries sometimes. Lots of interesting sights in Walmarts! Especially in the Southern States. Wow! ha! I was at a Walmart in Ohio where they had stalls for the Amish buggies to get in under out of the sun. Lots of buggies and horses running around the Walmart parking lot. Got pictures of that.
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Post by CherieKropp on Aug 9, 2015 14:12:39 GMT -5
"Anguished English" by Richard Lederer.
In a Tokyo Hotel: It is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not person to do such thing is please not to read notis.
In another Japanese hotel room: Please to bathe inside the tub.
In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable.
In a Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up.
In a Belgrade hotel elevator: To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order.
In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk.
In a hotel in Athens: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily.
In a Yugoslavian hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid.
In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid.
In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday.
In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension.
On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: Our wines leave you nothing to hope for.
On the menu of a Polish hotel: Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion.
In a Hong Kong supermarket: For your convenience, we recommend courteous, efficient self-service.
Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs.
In a Bangkok dry cleaners: Drop your trousers here for best results.
Outside a Paris dress shop: Dresses for street walking
In a Rhodes tailor shop: Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation.
Similarly, from the Soviet Weekly: There will be a Moscow Exhibition of Arts by 15000 Soviet Republic painters and sculptors. These were executed over the past two years.
In an East African newspaper: A new swimming pool is rapidly taking shape since the contractors have thrown in the bulk of their workers.
In a Vienna hotel: In case of fire, do your utmost to alarm the hotel porter.
A sign posted in Germany's Black Forest: It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose.
In a Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose.
In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist: Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists.
A translated sentence from a Russian chess book: A lot of water has been passed under the bridge since this variation has been played.
In a Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time.
In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours--we guarantee no miscarriages.
Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride on your own ass?
On the faucet in a Finnish washroom: To stop the drip, turn cock to right.
In the window of a Swedish furrier: Fur coats made for ladies from their own skin.
On the box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong: Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life.
Detour sign in Kyushi, Japan: Stop: Drive Sideways.
In a Swiss mountain inn: Special today -- no ice cream.
In a Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man.
In a Tokyo bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts.
In a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions.
On the door of a Moscow hotel room: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it.
In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar.
At a Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty.
In the office of a Roman doctor: Specialist in women and other diseases.
In an Acapulco hotel: The manager has personally passed all the water served here.
In a Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run.
From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself
From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor.
Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance: English well talking. Here speeching American.
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Post by slowtosee on Aug 9, 2015 14:26:22 GMT -5
IN the announcemnets last week at church, it was mentioned that Angela would be cooking at camp , and then added, please pray for them. After some audible chuckling, Wayne said , oops, that didn't come out so good. lol alvin
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Post by snow on Aug 9, 2015 14:55:47 GMT -5
Had an employee that used to work part time for a Japanese firm editing all their ads so those kinds of errors didn't happen, as Cherie posted above. Our language has so many idioms and usages that just must make it a nightmare for those who do not use it as their native language. Does make for some funny statements though. I found teaching idioms in my ESL classes where I volunteer, the hardest for them to grasp. They make no logical sense so this makes them hard to understand. We do have a lot of laughs though!!
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Aug 9, 2015 15:14:41 GMT -5
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Post by slowtosee on Aug 9, 2015 15:14:41 GMT -5
Idioms, are quite tricky. Imagine a few centuries from now, when they read about it raining "cats and dogs" here in North America. WOW , those guys were crazy. I understand though, that for a few people here it only rained "dogs", as they didn't like cats at all. Man, that must have hurt when that Bull Mastiff hit the ground, or hit you........... I suppose quite a few idioms in the Bible get fairly misunderstood, in this day and age. Alvin
idiom-“I worked the graveyard shift with old people, which was really demoralizing, because the old people didn’t have a chance in hell of ever getting out.”
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Post by xna on Aug 9, 2015 15:58:43 GMT -5
... Attachments:
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Aug 9, 2015 16:03:11 GMT -5
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Post by snow on Aug 9, 2015 16:03:11 GMT -5
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Aug 9, 2015 18:32:07 GMT -5
Post by BobWilliston on Aug 9, 2015 18:32:07 GMT -5
How appropriate. They're opening new facilities in LV.
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Post by xna on Aug 9, 2015 18:51:47 GMT -5
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Aug 9, 2015 19:43:12 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2015 19:43:12 GMT -5
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Post by Deleted on Aug 9, 2015 19:52:35 GMT -5
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Post by xna on Aug 10, 2015 6:48:39 GMT -5
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Post by xna on Aug 10, 2015 6:49:10 GMT -5
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Aug 10, 2015 7:02:52 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Aug 10, 2015 7:02:52 GMT -5
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Aug 10, 2015 10:36:10 GMT -5
Post by snow on Aug 10, 2015 10:36:10 GMT -5
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Aug 10, 2015 19:33:21 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Aug 10, 2015 19:33:21 GMT -5
Pity Hitler didn't use these more often on the Russian Front (given that the allies cracked his codes)
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Aug 10, 2015 20:38:04 GMT -5
Post by snow on Aug 10, 2015 20:38:04 GMT -5
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Aug 10, 2015 20:43:51 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Aug 10, 2015 20:43:51 GMT -5
Why Hitler got mad
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Aug 12, 2015 5:31:50 GMT -5
Post by Deleted on Aug 12, 2015 5:31:50 GMT -5
Now here's a "convention" for you.
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Aug 12, 2015 7:46:51 GMT -5
Post by elizabethcoleman on Aug 12, 2015 7:46:51 GMT -5
Ooh, Bert, I can't unsee that! I'll have bad dreams tonight.
I am highly intolerant of telemarketer calls. Even more so of bogus scam callers. Here are some of the dialogues:
Phonecall. Caller: "Hello ma'am, this is the technical office of Telstra calling about your internet connection. Me: "What about it?" Caller: "We are sorry to tell you that you are going to be disconnected tomorrow unless your account is fixed." Me: "Really? What's my account number?" Caller: "We in this area do not have that particular information ..." Me: "You are a liar and you belong in jail" Caller: "Shut up! Shut up!!" (Hangs up). Hmm. I think my internet connection will still be alive and well tomorrow.
Call between Telemarketer (TM) and myself (Liz)
TM: Good afternoon, because you have a low number of calls on this line you are eligible for our special offer... Liz: How do you know how many calls we have on this line? TM: Well, because you are eligible for our special offer... Liz: What makes us eligible? How are we eligible? TM: Well, you can have this special offer because you have a phone line ... Liz: Nothing else you've told me so far has been true, so I'm really not interested (click).
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Aug 12, 2015 7:58:05 GMT -5
Post by elizabethcoleman on Aug 12, 2015 7:58:05 GMT -5
This one is a true story and a riddle. Don't give it away if you've already heard it!
My husband and I went down the coast on a Friday night for the weekend. Early on the Saturday morning, I entered a beach house through the back door, came face to face with a startled stranger in the lounge room, and said "Oh, hi, I'm Liz. We just broke into the house next door, so we're going to have a shower there." And then I left again.
There was a very good explanation for all this. Can you guess what it was?
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Aug 12, 2015 8:02:37 GMT -5
Post by elizabethcoleman on Aug 12, 2015 8:02:37 GMT -5
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